


Dire Straits

by Gdubcarver



Category: Psy-Changeling - Nalini Singh
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2018-11-06 03:26:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 41,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11027628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gdubcarver/pseuds/Gdubcarver
Summary: Lucas and Sascha's baby girl was the world's only Psy-Changeling. That is, until Alupis shows up with the ability to teleport forwards through time and (sometimes) shift into a wolf.





	1. Chapter 1

The first thing she noticed was the smell. Bleach, blood, and other bodily fluids mingled with a number of other chemical smells she couldn't quite distinguish. NO. Hell. Where was she? Calming her natural urge to crinkle up her nose or hold her breath, Alupis did her best to lie completely still. Her brain knew it was the smart move to figure out the situation first before reacting, but the beeping noise by her head was getting faster and faster and her wolf was not about to let that beeping noise race up on her without a fight.

Growling and squinting, she sat upright in the white room she found herself in. Her body ached in ways long familiar and crushingly new, but she had to focus on her surroundings first. That damn beeping hadn't slowed, but she now saw that it wasn't a threat itself but a machine of some sort. 

_It's touching me! Damn it!_

Leaping off the bed to land clumsily on her one good foot, Alupis ripped off the cords and various tubes attached to her as carefully as she could under the circumstances. So what if it hurt. Any pain was worth it for freedom. Gripping the sides of the hospital bed, Alupis supported her weight as best she could as she hobbled towards the door. Mumbling in her native language, she did her best to reassure herself. 

"Deep breaths. This is a new place. This is not the old place. Look at all these new things. Couldn't possibly be the old place. I'm fine."

She started turning the doorknob when suddenly it turned further and a man in a long white coat barged through the door, yelling at her words she didn't understand.

The wolf didn't ask and didn't need to ask. Her wolf knew what this shit was and wasn't about to relive it. With claws and teeth extended, Alupis sidestepped the man's grasp before pushing him down onto the floor of the room. She slammed the door closed behind her and threw the nearest large object in front of the door. Grabbing a cot that appeared to be on wheels, she used her good leg to push her along while the rest of her weight was carried by the stretcher.

Men and women in navy blue tried to stop her but she ran them over with her momentum. Nothing could stop her. Nothing, that is, besides the dead end of the hallway she'd mistakenly chosen. 

Alupis growled low in her throat as she turned slowly around. Her pursuers had caught up by now. Her wolf grew stronger. Both parts of her knew what she needed to do. The alternative was really not an option.

Shifting forms never came easily for her. Even after all these years of practice, her shift was more of a gradual, agonizing change than the burst of sparks she'd seen in other changelings. Still, her struggles had taught her something useful: she could be terrifying.

Pushing past the pain in her mind and body, Alupis focused her thoughts on the shift. Fur began to grow along her skin. Her ears lengthened and became those of her wolf. Her human dimensions increased to mimic the size of her animal, but Alupis was very careful. These people had clearly seen a changeling before, but they had never seen anything like her. Their terror would be her ticket out of there. She shifted her hands into paws solely for the effect of then elongating and spreading her fingers like claws. She was perfect, the ideal nightmare werewolf who was nothing so tame and familiar as a changeling. She knew her eyes had gotten the crazed look of a wounded and trapped animal, but after all, that's exactly what she was and they ought to know better.

Amidst all her growling and changing, the nurses and orderlies had stopped. More than a few of them looked genuinely afraid. Good. She took one step forward. They backed away. Another step, and another away. So it went until she had a clear shot at the door. As she ran through in full wolf form now, she heard one of them yell something after her. It didn't matter. She couldn't understand them anyways. 

 

The air was cold as it whipped through her tawny fur, the adrenaline in her veins more than making up for her only having three functioning limbs. Her back leg was tucked protectively against her body and her current panic was helping her grow quickly accustomed to the new gait. She didn't know where she was going, but she knew she needed to get there as soon as possible. It didn't take her long to get away from the houses and other buildings surrounding the hospital and to reach the open plateau that seemed to go on forever. 

She ran, sometimes tunneling her way through the tall grasses, other times clawing over old snow that felt like it had started to melt only to be frozen again. Tired as she was, it wasn't until she found an isolated outcropping that she allowed herself to stop and lie down. 

With the adrenaline all used up, Alupis knew she would need the strength of a pack in order to survive. Not knowing who was around, she started with a few subvocal hellos. When no one answered, she howled quietly. With no responses, she howled loudly. _Is anyone there? Hello?_ A dire wolf's howl can be heard for miles and they have excellent hearing. Surely, one of them would be able to hear her. 

Alupis waited, listening to the breeze. What seemed like a lifetime later, she heard a rustling off to her side. Sniffing the air as she stood, she could scent wolf. Only, this was a different kind. These wolves weren't changelings, but wild grey wolves. Most of the pack stayed together in a tight formation, but one stepped slightly forward.

It's hard to put a wild wolf's words into, well, words, but the conversation basically went like this.

_Hello. I'm Alupis. Have you seen any other wolves like me around?_

_You're really big._

_Yes, I'm a dire wolf changeling. Dire wolves tend to be slightly larger than most grey wolves. Have you seen any?_

_Big wolf bad? Hurt?_

_No, I'm not looking for a fight. I'm looking for my pack._

_Join pack?_

_That's very nice, but no. I'm not looking to join your pack. I'm looking for a pack of my own kind._

_Changeling pack?_

_Yes, a changeling pack. The local chapter of the dire wolf changeling pack. Where is it?_

_(image of BlackEdge pack)_

_No, those aren't dire wolves. Big wolves. Big big wolves. Where big wolves?_

_No other wolves. (image of StoneWater pack)_

_Those are bears._

_No other wolves._

 

Alupis could see this wasn't going anywhere. She knew it was rude to use a telepathic howl, but desperate times called for desperate measures. She was still weak and if she couldn't find a pack healer soon she'd be in real trouble. Going into her mind, she tried to tap into her innate sense of pack. 

While it wasn't a hive mind, all dire wolves were connected to each other by bonds that had a faint telepathic echo. Since that link made warring between rival local packs rather difficult to maintain, all dire wolves belonged to the same pack. It didn't matter where in the world you were, if you were a dire wolf in dire straits, you were pack. That's just the way it worked.

_Hello? I need help. I'm hurt._

Nothing.

Alupis' range was larger than normal. Most wolves could only find packmates within 500 miles, but Alupis had practice going much farther than that. She closed her eyes and tilted her head down to the ground. Ears forward, she scanned the local area. Finding nothing, Alupis pushed until her mind reached the sea in the West, then the North, the East and finally the South. There wasn't a single dire wolf to be found. Maybe there's an island? She expanded the search 100 miles offshore. Even on the few land masses she found, there was no whisper of the pack she'd belonged to for so long. 

They were gone. The whole pack was gone. No, her wolf coughed in rejection at the idea as her ears went back and her spine arched as her tail tucked. That wasn't possible. They had been so many. And yet the scans were empty. They shouldn't have been empty. Any newborn pup would've automatically shown up in the pack. Except no one showed up in the pack. Taking some deep breaths, her wolf tried in vain to refute the evidence. To find someone. 

No longer able to keep it in, Alupis let the howl that had been building in her throat escape. Sometimes there are no words. Some hurts are too deep for anything besides music. So she howled and let the pain of her loss be softened by song. For this was the song of her people, and she would sing it as their funeral dirge. 

 

↞ ※ ↠

 

Blond hair ruffled in the wind as Senior Lieutenant Gregori Vanin ran along the outermost perimeter of BlackEdge's territory. Although Gregori didn't mind being assigned the occasional perimeter shift, this time he had specifically requested it. For the past week, his wolf had been driving him crazy. It kept pushing him to go out and away from the den, never content. It made trying to sleep in the den a bitch, but sleeping outside in Russia was even more of a bitch so he made do for the first few days. When the feeling only got worse, he figured he'd indulge his wolf and take one of the lonely shifts nobody really wants.

He was five minutes from the outpost and almost done with his shift when he heard her. No, not just heard her, heard HER. His mate. Damn wolf had been trying to tell him something all along. She was perfect and his and nearby and... Gregori faltered and almost tripped over a rock. Sad, his mate was heartbreakingly sad and alone and he needed to be with her right now. 

After shouting a quick explanation to his patrol partner in the cabin, Gregori didn't bother with his clothes before shifting. He needed to get to her and the wolf was faster than the man.

↞ ※ ↠

 

The wild wolves had joined her. Their warm bodies snuggled around her as they tried to reassure her with the bonds of a pack she didn't belong to. Still, the added body heat helped to offset the effects of her injuries and the cold seeping into her through the hard Russian ground. 

She was tired. So utterly tired. The sadness in her heart as she sang had felt like a knife wound. But just as she feared it would turn fatal, her sadness dulled as if the slicing edge of it had been taken away. Now she just felt hollow. She had come all this way and after all this time, what was the point of it all? She was still alone. Now even more so than ever. She sank a little further into the ground and allowed her eyes to lose focus as she stared at what she figured would be the last thing she'd see, a small grove of trees next to a couple large boulders.

_NOT ALONE_

The emotion crashed over her telepathic senses as suddenly she saw a large wolf with dark, silver-grey fur come hurtling towards her. She felt the bond click into place as soon as he was close enough for his pale eyes to meet hers. 

The wild wolves had taken the newcomer's arrival as their signal to leave. Alupis made an effort to stand up, but he lay down in front of her before she could. Paw to paw and nose to nose, Alupis sighed and leaned into the touch of their foreheads. She was home. 

 

Gregori gently guided his mate's head down as she lost consciousness. He wanted to curse but couldn't think of a word strong enough to match finding his mate as she lay dying. He could feel it through the bond, but damned if he was going to let it happen. He would drain every ounce of his life force into her before he'd allow that. 

But right now he needed a better solution than just pouring water into a leaky teapot. He needed to get her to the pack and their healer as quickly as possible. That probably would've been easier if she were smaller and, well, conscious, but Gregori had faced harder problems than this. 

Taking a moment to gaze over his mate and appreciate her beauty, he chuckled to himself, _Damn, my mate's got a big wolf. Ha, and Selenka jokes about_ my _size. Wait 'till she sees I found a mate to match._

Just as he began to raise his head and howl for his patrol partner to come help, a group of juveniles ran up. 

_We heard a wolf howling and we didn't recognize the voice so we came running. What happened?_

_She's my mate and she's hurt badly. We need to get her to Dasha as fast as possible._

_Her howl, it was so..._

_Pavel, I need you to focus and go see if you can find tree limbs we can use for a stretcher. Christina, Eva, go with him. Mikhail, I need you to run to the outpost and tell Niko to follow my trail here to help carry her. Then run as fast as you can to the den and get Dasha to meet us on our way to the den. She's dehydrated and while the bleeding appears to have mostly stopped her wounds are definitely raw and probably infected._

The juveniles all raced off on their assigned tasks and Gregori turned his full attention once more on his mate. She was much too thin for her size and everything about her screamed of neglect. Her ribs were showing and her coat was dull, matted, and had patches missing. Some tender care would fix that soon enough, but in the meantime he had to find the source of the blood he smelled on her. Some old scars were visible on her back and side, but otherwise the only wounds he could see were a few shallow scratches. Obviously those weren't what he sensed killing her. He gently nudged at her neck and side until her weight shifted onto her left side. 

His wolf sucked in a breath and he had to take a step back as his vision tunneled red for a hot minute. There was no stopping the growl in his throat, even after he was able to see again. Someone who he'd make very very dead and painfully dead had cut his mate. Two long cuts joined together to make a V on her chest where another joined it and stretched the length of her belly. Thick black thread joined the edges of her skin together like some sick pre-mortem autopsy. Only unlike on a corpse these cuts were a vibrant red instead of white. 

There was a lot of dried blood on her underbelly. Part of his brain was examining the stitches to find the source while the other part was trying to figure out how to clean the wound without further contaminating it with his saliva or dirty snow. He was halfway down when he noticed the thing that should've been obvious had he not been so overwhelmed by the cuts. Her left hind paw was missing from right above her wolf's ankle. 

 

↞ ※ ↠


	2. Chapter 2

This time when Alupis opened her eyes, wakefulness came more gently. Much was the same as before. The smell was similar, but less intense and the beeping was much slower this time around. The hand stroking her head and ears was a definite improvement.

Mate. I have a mate. A pulse of love and joy came through the bond. She sent one back with love and contentment as she closed her eyes. She had every intention of giving in to the grogginess of the pain medications when the bond spoke of worry and the need to tell her something. 

She blinked slowly until she could keep her eyelids up for longer. The view was certainly an incentive. Blond hair, blue eyes, strong muscles and a look of 'I could kill you with my pinkie but instead I'm going to kill anyone who even thinks of messing with you'. 

"You need to stay in wolf form until you're more fully healed." Gregori said in Russian. 

A questioning sense through the bond. 

"Your bones won't reset properly if you shift before they're fully healed."

Again, a question. 

This time Gregori repeated himself in English.

Question and a slight frustration came from her end of the bond as her wolf sighed and looked at him. 

_Stay,_ His wolf growled through his human throat. _Stay wolf._

At that she nodded and went back to sleep.

↞ ※ ↠

Selenka stayed on the other side of the glass for now as she watched Gregori with his mate. She was asleep and sprawled across two hospital beds with Gregori snuggled along the edge behind her. One arm pillowed her head as the other stroked slowly down her side, carefully avoiding any of her injuries. Weak as she was, Gregori rarely left Alupis' side for anything except his lieutenant duties. Even those were shortened as understanding packmates offered to cover shifts for him.

"I don't think I've ever seen Gregori in shorts before." Selenka commented to the pack's longtime healer, Dasha. 

"I know," laughed Dasha, "He hasn't even seen his mate in human form yet and he's already crazy about skin privileges. I haven't seen anyone this bad since Paul and I were first mated."

"Long pants?" Selenka deadpanned, "Noo, that's far too much covered."

"Hahaha, they're going to be terrible once she's well enough to shift."

"Yes, well, hopefully she gets a little smaller when that happens otherwise I'm not sure there's a bed big enough to fit them both."

"Maybe they can push two California Kings together" Dasha offered.

"You joke, but I'm not so sure." Selenka waited a beat before adding more seriously, "So how's she doing?"

"My main concern right now is her infection. My equipment shows that most of her internal organs have been severely irritated and I'm worried about sepsis, but she's responding well to the general antibiotics and the fever she came in with has broken so that's an excellent sign. Other than that, I've reset a few old fractures that hadn't healed correctly and were limiting the expansion of her diaphragm. I had to amputate a little more of her back leg in order to remove the damaged tissues close the amputation site, but I'm less worried about that one. I made sure it was all immaculate before sewing the skin over it so the risk of infection there is minimal as long as an infection doesn't spread to her bloodstream."

Selenka noted the older woman's defensive posture and scrunched eyebrows asshe asked, "So what do you think happened to her?"

"Honestly? I don't know why anyone would do this, but it looks like someone cut her open just so they could look at her organs and sneeze on everything before sealing her back up. I would say it was some sick sadistic bastard, but maybe this one was more curious than cruel. Does that make sense?"

"Like she was a science experiment?" Selenka asked.

"Yes. But why someone would need to carve her up just to see what any medical scanner could've shown them is beyond me."

"Sounds like they should've stuck with the science fair volcano and called it a day. Any leads on who our Doctor Frankenstein might be?"

Dasha brought her hand to her forehead and began rubbing out the tension with her thumb and forefinger. "Between the threads used to sew her up and the overall half-assedness of the medical procedures I'd say we're looking for someone who found an ancient medical textbook in an antique shop and decided to go fact-checking it in real life. Not much to go on."

Selenka brought her in for a hug. "You're doing the best you can and those two are still alive and ridiculous because of you." She held on for a bit longer until the healer felt a little stronger. "Besides, you'll never guess who's interested in helping this mystery wolf."

"Who?"

"Kaleb Krycheck."

"What? How does he even know about her?"

"Apparently his mate, Sahara, was having a meeting with some empaths when they heard the howl and all started crying. She wanted to know if everyone was alright. I've assured her that the situation is under control, but she sounded genuinely concerned. Apparently several of the empaths have been asking about her."

"Most people who have recently lost a limb benefit from counseling. It might not be a bad idea to set up a meeting if Sahara knows of an empath who's interested."

"I think you're right, but we should probably wait until after she can shift back safely." Glancing at the couple again as she moved towards the door, Selenka added, "If she stays wolf for much longer, do you think Gregori will put on a speedo for the skin contact?"

It took several minutes for the two BlackEdge women to calm down after that and as Selenka finally made her way out of the Infirmary, she knew that despite the strain, their healer was going to be ok.

↞ ※ ↠

Between Dasha's healing abilities and Gregori sending strength and energy through the mating bond, Alupis was healing very quickly. That being said, it was still a full two weeks before she was allowed to even try standing. At halfway through her third week, Dasha deemed her ready to begin mild physical therapy by walking around the den. Her leg wouldn't be healed enough for her to shift for another week, but the walk would act as a good measurement for whether she could be released from the infirmary in the meantime.

"Your bones are fully healed and your back leg is coming along nicely, but it's still important that you don't overdo it." Dasha directed her words to Alupis even though it was really Gregori she was warning. "Dizziness and general fatigue are both common side effects of sepsis even after the infection is mostly gone so if it gets to be too much, stop."

Alupis nodded as she did at most things while Gregori promised they would behave.

Gregori set a slow pace for them as he began to show her around the den. Even though she didn't know what he was saying, Alupis enjoyed hearing the sound of his voice and was taking careful note of the layout of the den. His hand never left her fur and his hip rarely left her side. It was reassuring. 

Alupis knew what was coming and wasn't looking forward to it. She had seen the alpha many times when she had come to visit and the woman radiated power. Now that Alupis was mostly healed, it was only a matter of time before she ran into the alpha again and would have to fight for her rank in the pack. Being mated made it easier. At least she was guaranteed the peace of not being kicked out. But if she wanted a rank that reflected her natural dominance, she would have to fight for it. That was the way packs worked. Dire wolves could change between local chapters of packs, but your place in the hierarchy always needed to be fought for soon after your arrival. Otherwise there would be chaos. Her injuries had only postponed the inevitable. 

"Down that hallway is the nursery and over here is one of the training rooms." Gregori explained "It's always good to have the soldiers nearby for the pups. It reminds us of why we're training. Would you like to see?"

Gregori had no intention of taking her in, but he figured a good sparring match was always entertaining. He opened the door and stood in the threshold.

"That's Niko over there with some of the juveniles. Do you remember...Hey!"

Alupis had pushed past him into the training room and was walking pointedly toward where Selenka had been demonstrating a particularly ruthless fighting technique. Gathering her nerve, Alupis decided it was better to just get it over with so she could stop worrying about it. Closing the distance as Selenka turned to face her, Alupis let out the fiercest growl she had in her.

"The fuck?" Selenka said with an eyebrow raise as her expression quickly turned from welcome surprise to aggressively dominant. 

Come to think of it, maybe she should've waited until she was stronger after all.This was NOT going to be a good fight for her, but it was too late for Alupis to back down now. So instead she snarled again and snapped her teeth. 

Eyes pinning Alupis in her place, Selenka's words came out deceptively calm. "Gregori, I will not kill your mate but I can't promise not to hurt her. Stop her now or lose your chance to intervene."

Alupis could feel his anger through the mating bond. Using the bond as their primary means of communication had made it easy for her to read his emotions, not that she needed help with that now. He was practically bristling as he stepped in front of her. 

"Let me figure out what the fuck is going on for a minute. She's still sick, okay? Let me figure it out." He shouted.

Selenka didn't back down from the dominance challenge, but neither did she move to attack. It was the best the alpha could give him.

Facing his mate, Gregori cupped her head in his hands and pushed their foreheads together in the way they'd discovered helped them communicate. After weeks of practicing, they had grown adept at sending images as well as emotions over the bond. He was trying to find an image to ask why she was doing this when Alupis preempted his question with an image of her own. He saw a pack of wolves running through a meadow and a new wolf coming to join them. The image faded and was replaced by a piece of slate that had the letters of the Greek alphabet written on it as a piece of chalk pointed at each of the letters.

Gregori sent back an image of what he'd like to see her do, which was back the hell down.

Immediately the piece of chalk pointed at the omega. 

Damn it. She wasn't going to back down if she thought it would put her at the bottom of the pack. But he could sense that she didn't really want this fight. She was afraid. For whatever reason, his mate felt she had to fight Selenka to earn her place in his pack. He felt like this was somehow his fault, but he didn't know how to fix it. If only he could take her place. He sent a picture of the new wolf running with the pack. If only she would understand that she didn't need to earn it. Being mated to him meant she was already a part of BlackEdge. 

Take my place! Alupis could almost swear that she heard the echo of that thought in Gregori's mind. Her telepathy was low, but this was her mate. She sent a new image of a wolf standing over the neck of another wolf and taking up the challenge. To make it more clear, she then had that wolf go over to the Greek alphabet and point with his nose at the letters. 

Gregori didn't send an image back, but turned to face his alpha. 

"I do not renounce the oath I took as your Lieutenant but I need you to trust me, Selenka." A moment later his body was a shower of sparks as he shifted. 

Selenka had fought hard to contain her wolf after Alupis' little dominance display. Now that her Lieutenant had shifted and taken up the challenge, however, she was no longer able to hold her wolf inside. Still, woman and wolf had to be sure. Gregori was one of her most senior lieutenants and it would hurt the pack if she attacked without being absolutely sure.

Gregori moved slowly and carefully as he managed to step over his mate's lowered neck without making any moves forward against Selenka. 

_I take up the challenge for my mate's rank in BlackEdge._ Gregori told the crowd that had gathered. 

_Selenka, she thinks she has to fight you, but will you agree to determine her rank based on the natural dominance and abilities she displays? Just as you do with the rest of us?_

Selenka eyed the wolf in question. Now that Gregori had taken up the challenge, Alupis was lying submissively underneath him, watching the situation intently but calmly.

_Of course._ Her wolf now much calmer, Selenka closed the gap between them and leaned down to lick Alupis on the nose. _Welcome to BlackEdge._

Selenka almost laughed aloud at the dumbfounded look on her face. Alupis kept looking from Selenka to Gregori and back again, trying to figure out what just happened. All of a sudden, she was licking Gregori's chin and wagging her tail like a pup as realization finally dawned on her. Her mate had taken on the alpha for her and won her a rank without even having to fight! She must be mated to the scariest fricken wolf in the whole den. She barked triumphantly before scampering out from under him and bouncing around for a bit before coming back for some more good natured face licking. She was just coming back from her third round of running around the gym when she started to feel how tired she was. This had been a rough day for her. Gregori felt the change and shifted to catch her as she snuggled into him. 

"I think I better get her back to the infirmary. Dasha's going to be pissed." With that comment, Gregori hefted his mate into his arms and carried her back to their double hospital bed. 


	3. Chapter 3

After seeing the state of exhaustion Alupis was in after the training incident, Dasha made up her mind to order Alupis to several days bed rest and to not let Gregori take her home until Alupis was fully recovered. When the two finally woke up around noon, Dasha was standing there with her arms folded, waiting for them.

"Clearly I can't trust you two not to overdo it. So until she's healthy enough for such activity, she's staying where I can keep an eye on her," Dasha said bluntly. "Do you understand, Gregori?"

"Yes, ma'am," the lieutenant replied sheepishly. Looking down at his still groggy mate, he rubbed Alupis' arm and asked, "She gunna be ok?"

"Yes," Dasha said in a more gentle tone. "She's worn out and she'll need to be on bed rest for the next few days, but she'll recover. And so will you, Mr. I'm-so-strong-and-don't-need-all-this-energy-I'm-pouring-into-my-mate-Vanin. Don't think I haven't noticed. I've told Selenka that you're not strong enough to run your regular patrols and so your shifts for the next two days have been taken care of."

"Are you punishing me?" Gregori looked her in the face.

"Yes."

Gregori snuggled impossibly closer to Alupis. "Deal."

↞ ※ ↠

Two weeks after the training room incident, Alupis' leg was finally healed enough for her to try shifting. In a surprising twist of events, Gregori sat fully clothed in the chair next to the bed as Dasha entered the room with Selenka. 

"Today's the day," Dasha ruffled Alupis' ears and smiled. "Are you ready to be human again?"

A timid nod came from the wolf sitting on the bed. Having Gregori translate things into pictures for her had become automatic. 

"Alright then, let's try. Now between the new leg and how long you've been in this form, it might be a little painful, but you need to try."

Alupis took a deep breath and shielded the mental bond she shared with Gregori. He wouldn't be used to this kind of shifting and he didn't need to feel what was about to happen. That task done, Alupis decided to start with her hands. Those were normally the easiest. Her skin had that pins and needles feeling of a limb long unused, but it wasn't anything unbearable...yet. Working through the discomfort and then pain, she shifted her arms up to her biceps before moving to her feet. This was more difficult. The one leg was comparatively easy, but as she tried to stretch out her missing foot, she yelped in pain and lost all of her progress. 

"Shh, hey, it's ok," Gregori comforted her.

"Why is she only partial shifting?" Selenka asked.

"I'm not sure," Dasha replied "Maybe she thinks it'll make shifting the foot easier? Gregori, tell her to shift all at once. It'll hurt for a shorter amount of time."

"I'll try."

Alupis couldn't explain to them that this was how she always had to get out of the shift, but this time she tried to move things along quicker. She got most of her skin, both arms and a leg done before that darn back foot got her again. This time her wolf whined in a simple plea to just stay this way for a while longer. 

"Your body is ready for the shift," Dasha told her gently. "The longer you stay wolf, the more painful the shift will be."

Gregori rubbed her cheek in the way she liked and said. "I want to see how beautiful my mate is. Will you really keep her from me?" Whispering now in her ear, he added, "I want to kiss you."

Speckled brown wolf eyes looked imploringly at him before Alupis closed her eyes and tried again. This time when the pain hit, she grabbed Gregori by the arm and pushed through it.

When she opened her eyes, Gregori was holding her. She blinked and smiled as he remained speechless, staring at her face. She raised her hand from his bicep and pushed his jaw closed before kissing him. They stayed that way for a while, but as they heard Dasha and Selenka move to leave, Gregori broke the kiss. 

“Wait! You need to see her eyes," He began. 

"Yes, yes, I'm sure she has beautiful..." Selenka spoke as she turned, but now was struck as speechless as Gregori had been.

Alupis had long, straight black hair, coppery skin and a rounded face. While she was pretty, it was her eyes that caught everyone's attention immediately. A midnight star-scape stared back at them as Alupis sighed in a knowing kind of resignation.

"How the _fuck_ is she a cardinal?" Selenka broke into the silence.

"Don't look at me," Gregori replied as if he'd been accused.

"You're her mate, how the hell did you not pick up on this?" Selenka said.

"We've all known she was a different breed of wolf from day one. Nobody has seen a dire wolf since the territorial wars. Obviously, I knew she was a little different but I figured it was because she's a dire. Have YOU ever seen a changeling who was also a cardinal psy?" Gregori challenged back.

"Shit. Lucas Hunter. He's got a cub that's half psy."

"Should we call him?" Dasha chimed in.

"And tell him what? That we found a Psy-Changeling in the woods and decided to keep her? This is pack business."

"But for how much longer?" Dasha calmly reasoned "Eventually she'll need to go outside and the eyes of a cardinal are hard to hide."

"Hawke's mate is a cardinal. I heard SierraTech found a way to hide them behind colored contact lenses. That's an option," Selenka responded.

"My mate will not be hiding," said Gregori. "I won't do that to her."

"Then you accept that you're putting your mate in danger any time she leaves the den," Selenka said resolutely.

"No."

"Well, those are your options, Gregori."

"Maybe not," Dasha spoke up, "Nadiya Hunter is a psy-changeling and while I admit that she is under threat, everyone knows that she is very well protected. After what's happened, very few would be stupid enough to try to hurt or capture her. No one wants to go up against a man like Lucas Hunter."

"So what are you suggesting?" asked Selenka.

"I'm suggesting that we tell people," she held up a hand to stop any comments before she finished, "Not everyone, but a few people who will undoubtedly be interested and who are also powerful enough to back us up should anyone decide that our packmate is an easier target than little miss Hunter."

Immediately seeing the sense in Dasha's statement, Selenka said, "I think we should tell Kaleb first out of anyone. He's our closest neighbor and we don't want to poison our relationship with him by having him hear about this from somewhere else. Plus, he’s damn powerful in the Net.”

Gregori tried unsuccessfully to force down the growl that sprang up at the thought of his mate in the same room with Kaleb Krychek. 

"Calm down, Vanin, she won't go unprotected. You can stay with her every step of the way. Besides," Selenka noted, "Krychek would've found out soon enough on his own. That man has eyes and ears everywhere. Even if we allowed Ivy Jane to be the first one to find out at her counseling session in two days, there's no guarantee that Ivy won't mention something to Sahara since she's the one who initially arranged it. And if Sahara knows, Kaleb will know since mates don't keep secrets from each other."

Gregori huffed a little bit, but overall managed to not look overly petulant. 

"Unless either of you have any major tactical concerns about it, I'll contact Krychek and set up the meeting for as early as possible so that we can pre-empt the meeting with Ivy."

"I won't agree to it unless Sahara is there too. Kaleb won't cause any harm on the physical or psychic plane if she's there to see it."

"I agree."

↞ ※ ↠

After making contact with Kaleb through his aide, Silver Mercant, Selenka was able to set up a meeting at the usual place the very next afternoon. Selenka arrived at the isolated outcropping in BlackEdge's territory first to make sure everything went as planned. Gregori and his mate were to wait a short distance away and come out only once Selenka called for them. 

Arriving precisely on time, Kaleb teleported in to stand on top of a rock. 

"So, where's this mystery wolf I couldn't wait to meet?" Kaleb asked unenthusiastically. 

"That depends, wasn't your mate supposed to be with you?"

"Yes," Kaleb admitted, "But Sahara informs me that such meetings require hot beverages and has requested I teleport you all to our home."

"So, you drink hot beverages?" Selenka asked with a blank expression.

"I blame Ivy Jane's influence," if he'd been any less silent, Selenka would've sworn he was slightly annoyed. Kaleb did not invite people over lightly. "Bring out your people and we can be off."

Selenka whistled and Gregori appeared through the trees with his mate a minute later. Kaleb teleported the four of them before the other pair even reached the meeting spot. The next instant, they found themselves standing on a large patio overlooking a deep gorge and Alupis was screaming. 


	4. Chapter 4

"NO!" Alupis screamed in her native language as her fingers desperately grabbed for Gregori, her claws sinking deep in his arm as her eyes went wolf brown. Heedless of everyone watching her, she grabbed Gregori roughly by the chin and turned his face this way and that as she searched his features intently. After a full minute, she seemed content with what she found there and turned to take in the rest of the group. Her eyes glanced over Selenka and Sahara before settling into a glare on Kaleb.

"Is everything ok?" Sahara was picking up several unusual languages from her mystery guest, but decided on the one the glaring girl had just used. Sahara didn't like the way she was acting towards Kaleb and was hoping to distract her. 

Sure enough, Alupis' head snapped towards her with a look of awed wonder. 

"You can understand me?"

"Yes, I can."

Sahara had been hoping for a distraction, but she was not prepared for the reaction she received. Alupis' eyes filled with tears and her hands didn't seem to know whether to cover her face, her mouth or her heart, so instead she used them to wipe her face dry and moved to embrace this woman who had just spoken a language that had been dead for thousands of years. 

"It's ok, Kaleb." Sahara reassured her mate as she stepped into the hug.

"It's been so long," Alupis sobbed as Sahara held her and rubbed her back.

The others looked at each other awkwardly, unsure of what to do or say as Sahara comforted the crying Alupis. 

"Kaleb, why don't you pour us some tea?" Sahara offered. 

Grateful for something to do, Kaleb walked over to the table where Sahara had set out the copper teapot and colorful cups she'd picked up on their last trip to Morocco. Taking that as a cue, Selenka and Gregori sat down on two of the patio chairs. Gregori made sure to leave the seat in between them open for Alupis so she'd be protected by pack on both sides. 

Once the tide of emotion had passed, Alupis stepped back with a wipe of her eyes and chuckled, "Haha, I'm sorry for getting so emotional. How do you know Wakota? Where did you learn it? I haven't heard anyone speak it since I was a little girl."

Now that she was calmer, Alupis' eyes had changed from the deep brown of her wolf back into her cardinal's black with white specks. Sahara's eyebrows shot up in surprise as she answered, "I have a unique talent that lets me learn a language simply by being around a native speaker. What about you? What is your psychic ability? Where are you from?”

"That's a long story," Alupis took a deep breath and slid into the same chair as Gregori so that she and Sahara could sit next to each other. Alupis accepted the warm teacup and took a sip as she said, "But before we begin, can I ask you a few questions?"

"Of course," Sahara replied. 

"Pointing and gesturing only goes so far, so just to be sure; am I correct in thinking their names are Mate and Selenka?"

"Um, technically he is your mate so you can call him that, but his actual name is Gregori. Mate is just a term that shows your relationship to him. And yes, Selenka is your alpha's name. "

"Oh, ok," Alupis nodded. 

Gregori could hear her practicing his name subvocally and squeezed her hand as he smiled and rubbed his thumb over her skin. He liked the way it sounded on her lips and was mentally storing away plans for later.

After a few seconds, Alupis added, "And what are your names?"

"My name is Sahara and my mate's name is Kaleb."

"Sahara and Kaleb," she practiced. "My name is Alupis. Where are we?"

"It's nice to meet you, Alupis. Our home is just outside of Moscow."

"And where is Moscow?"

"It's the capital of Russia."

Alupis nodded and tried to think of what to ask next. She had so many questions but never imagined she'd find someone she could actually ask and found herself unprepared. 

"And you?" Sahara broke into the pause, "Where are you from, Alupis?"

"Um, that's hard to explain. You asked me earlier what my abilities are as a Psy, so it's probably easiest if I start there. The psy who tested me said that I have level 3 telepathy and that whatever my cardinal power is, my "mongrel nature" had neutralized it. But that Psy was a bigoted idiot, so only the telepathy part of that is true. I guess there isn't a name for what I do, but it's similar to what Kaleb did to get us here."

"What is she saying?" Kaleb broke in, "I heard my name."

"She's saying that her cardinal powers are similar to teleporting, but different," Sahara explained before turning back to Alupis, "Do you mind if I translate your story for the others as you tell it?"

"Yes, please. I need him to know this. I mean, I need the rest of you to know this too, but Gregori should definitely know."

"Alright, then, I'll translate as we go."

Alupis opened her mouth to begin, then stopped to readjust her position so she was now on top of Gregori’s lap with his arms wrapped around her. Goodness, his touch was comforting…and distracting…"Where was I?"

"You were telling us about yourself. Your ability and where you're from," Sahara supplied. 

“Oh, yes. I have the ability to teleport forward through time. When I was little, I could only go a week or a month forward, but as I got older my powers developed to the point where I can now jump centuries and to places as well as times," Alupis paused as if waiting for Sahara or someone else to call her crazy or a liar.

"Oh, so that's why this language has so many roots to modern ones!" Sahara exclaimed.

It was nice to actually be believed for a change, so Alupis continued to explain. "I'm not sure exactly how old I am, but I was born before things began to be written down. I know my tribe's village was somewhere on the plains and there was a river and a small forest nearby, but it's been so long that I don't know where it would be today. Maps and history books weren't really used or even invented back then so your guess is as good as mine as to when and where I'm from. What I do know, however, is that when I was born there were no Psy and there were no Changelings. Every now and then we would hear rumors of people with powers, but sometimes truth was hard to separate from legend. Anyways, my parents had no idea of what I was until I was old enough to start walking. My mother told me that one moment she was tending the fire as I played and the next moment I was gone. They had no idea where I'd gone or what had happened to me, so when my one-year-old self had been gone for a whole week, everyone assumed I'd either died in the elements or been killed by an animal. When I suddenly reappeared in exactly the same condition I'd left in, the elders of the tribe declared that the spirits had returned me as a favor to my parents. A few days later, I shifted into my wolf for the first time and when they saw it the tribe decided I was a spirit warrior. 

As I got older, my powers grew more intense and I began accidentally 'porting ahead for a couple weeks, a month, several months, and then a year. We slowly realized that my disappearances were linked to my emotions, so I did my best to stay calm and avoid any triggers. But when I was eight, I got into a fight with my parents over something stupid and my anger caused another jump forward and when I reappeared my mother's hair was snow white and I discovered that my father had been dead for the last year. After that, I did everything I could to keep from jumping. I limited my emotions and my interactions with people and I let my wolf have more and more control of my mind. When my mother died four winters later, I 'ported a couple times back to back. 

I stayed with my people for a while. They knew me from the stories of the elders, but they had thought I was some long ago legend. They called me Spirit Wolf and treated me well. But I didn't have family or any friends and since there was no one else I knew like me, I didn't really know who or what I was. So about a year after my mother died, I decided to start trying to direct and control my powers instead of just fighting them. I bounced around a lot for... maybe a few years? Time wasn't really a constant for me. I would land and pass out for a while and then join the local dire wolf pack for a bit as I rebuilt my strength for the next jump. With practice, I became able to direct my 'porting to general geographic regions and worked my way smaller from there."


	5. Chapter 5

"So you don't actually have an image of where you're porting to?" Kaleb asked incredulously once Sahara finished translating, "How do you know you won't teleport to the middle of an ocean or off the side of a cliff?"

"Those don't present as options to me," Alupis responded with a shake of her head, "I have a general sense of where I can and can't land. I don't really know how I know it, but it hasn't let me down yet. Well, I mean there was that one time I landed in a men's public bathhouse in Rome, but technically that wasn't deadly. It was just REALLY embarrassing."

"You saw the Roman Empire? How many places have you been?" Sahara asked excitedly.

"How many naked men have you seen?" Gregori asked less excitedly at about the same time.

"Let's just say a lot, but that I like this one the best," Alupis replied.

"Are you answering my question or hers?" Gregori asked.

"Yes." Alupis answered.

"So what was it like? What all have you seen?" Sahara continued her stream of questions. 

It was Alupis' turn to raise her eyebrows as she asked, "What, the time periods or the men?"

"What?" Sahara looked confused. She must not have heard Gregori's earlier question. Actually, no. She wouldn’t have. It’d been subvocal.

"Nothing. It took me at least a few millennia to get here, so I've seen a lot. After I got more control of my powers, I decided to stick around in one place for a little longer and try to find others like me and work on my shifting. The first place I stayed was in Egypt because that was the first place I'd come across changelings who could shift completely. They probably weren't the first to do it, but they were the first I met.

Anyways, I was hoping they could help me with my shifting, so I tried to get closer to them by working in Pharaoh's palace since that's where they all lived."

"Wait," Selenka spoke up for the first time, "So you haven't always been able to shift? What about the other changelings?"

"Ugh, don't get me started on how easy things are for you," Alupis looked to the sky and shook her head, "Hold on, don't translate that. Let me be a little more respectful. Ease of shifting is something that has slowly developed over thousands of years as those who were good at it made babies with those who were also good at it. But for the first few generations after the races began to separate, shifting was damn hard. The first time you shift as a baby, your body seems to figure it out instinctively. For literally every other time you shift after that, however, your human brain remembers how painful the experience was and tries to fight it, which only makes it longer and more difficult."

"Sometimes people even get stuck mid-shift," Alupis continued her rant, "Ever hear of the name Anubis?"

"Yeah," said Sahara.

"That's what it sounds like when you try to say 'Alupis' when your head gets stuck as a wolf for three months."

"You're Anubis?" Sahara asked.

"Three months?" Selenka hissed in a breath through her teeth.

Gregori laughed a little bit and kissed her on the cheek. Kaleb, as usual, was silent. 

"Yes," Alupis answered, "and let me tell you, being a god is fun, but being the god of death is decidedly NOT fun. Pharaoh Djoser fricken locked me in his tomb when he died so I could 'guard him in the afterlife'." 

"How did you get out?" Sahara asked.

Alupis gestured towards her eyes and answered, "I only had about a month left before I could use my ability again, so I lived off of the food and wine he'd left for himself in the afterlife and practiced my shifting until I got my face back."

"How long is your recovery time between jumps?" Kaleb asked strategically.

"It depends," Alupis answered vaguely as she stared down the former councilor. She still hadn't completely forgiven him for teleporting Gregori without her consent. 

Gregori pushed his forehead against her temple as a silent rebuke against her blossoming grudge. He kissed her ear and subvocally whispered, "Remember, even if Sahara likes you, it's Kaleb who we might need help from someday. If you're taken, he can go places I can't. He needs to know any variables so he can help." Although he spoke in Russian, he tied his words to the emotions and images he sent through their bond. 

"It depends on how far I jumped and the emotions which fed the jump to begin with," Alupis sighed, "I can jump one year without much effort, and if I go at that pace I haven't found a limit on how frequently I can jump. For farther distances, I need to take a break afterwards. Anything over 500 years results in a flame out and I can't jump at all for about a year afterwards. It also depends on how much food I can find. For instance, I stuck around Rome a little longer than most places because the whole Romulus and Remus thing made them really favorable towards wolf changelings and they fed me well. I even got an education in Rome because a wealthy family took me in. When I left, I pushed my limits to see how far I'm able to jump in one trip and ended up going almost 1500 years. Before then, most of my longest trips were just short of 900 years."

"What year did you jump to here from?" Kaleb asked.

"It felt like sometime between 1448 and 1450."

"You're not sure?" questioned Kaleb, "What's your predicted recovery time on a 634 or 636 year teleport?"

“No, Mr. Krychek, I am never sure of exact years. People think they know what year it is because their culture tells them how long a cycle is. But these things change and people have often changed their minds about how long a year should be throughout history,” what a typical Psy, Alupis thought to herself, thinking he’s better just because he ‘knows what year it is’, “And with recovery time, I landed in pretty bad shape, so I'm not sure yet how much that will impact my wait. I probably have somewhere around eleven months left, but I'll have a better sense of it once the date gets closer." 

"And until that time, do you have any use of your psychic abilities?" Kaleb clarified.

"My telepathy doesn't seem to be impacted by it, if that's what you're asking. In terms of my time jumping, I couldn't teleport even a minute into the future right now regardless of if I wanted to or if someone tried to force me. Especially this close to the jump, no amount of pain or emotion could cause it to happen accidentally."

"Are you able to shift fully or are you still limited to partial shifts?" Kaleb continued what was beginning to feel like an interrogation.

"I am a wolf. I can shift as much and as completely as I wish," Alupis said a bit too forcefully. 

"Are your abilities accessible while you are in wolf form?"

Alupis turned to check with Gregori before answering in a calmer tone than she had before, "Mostly no, but I think the telepathy is at least partially accessible to my wolf. In Egypt, I couldn't leave until I un-shifted my head."

Kaleb nodded to show he understood before turning to address Selenka, "So why have you brought her to me? What do you want from me, Selenka?"

"Your reputation." Selenka said in her straightforward style, "My pack is strong, but once the existence of another Psy-Changeling becomes known, she will inevitably become a target for those who oppose the Trinity Accords. We are putting security measures in place, but I am concerned that those currently frustrating themselves over the Hunter cub will mistakenly think Alupis is any less well guarded and try something. While my pack will provide her protection, the knowledge that you would aid in her recovery would help act as a deterrent. 

Should anything happen to her, I don't want to simply react. I want the leaders of the Trinity Accords to publicly try the case. I know that the accords are not a legislative body and are only designed to foster communication between the races. However, communication doesn't always stop confrontation and the races will soon need a neutral third party to judge between them in special cases. Trinity is already poised to fill that gap."

"And you would be willing to give up your right to dole out the decided punishment?" Kaleb asked skeptically. Changeling thirst for vengeance was legendary.

"I won't pretend to not care about that. I'm sure Gregori here would want nothing more than to rip their throats out." Gregori nodded at the statement as Selenka continued, "Should Trinity decide to hand over execution of the sentence to us, we would appreciate it. However, if the Trinity Accords are to succeed, they will need to have some teeth. This added role would provide those teeth."

"And your lieutenant is fine with this?" Kaleb addressed the Alpha first before turning to Gregori himself, "If your mate was harmed, could you go along with Trinity regardless of what is decided? Even if you disagree with the decision?"

A muscle on the side of Gregori's chin clenched for a moment before he answered, "Alupis needs the kind of world that the Trinity Accords is offering. If that means I have to give up my right to punish whatever bastard tries to hurt her, so be it. If I don't and Trinity falls from power, then the bastard who's really hurting her is me."

"And if we decide to be lenient?"

"I'd be fucking pissed, but I won't hurt Alupis."

Kaleb nodded and seemed to be weighing the situation before again addressing the Alpha, "I assume you'll be bringing Alupis to other Trinity members soon?"

"It would be foolish not to." Selenka replied. 

Kaleb rose to signal the end of this meeting as he said, "I will agree to help you find and return your packmate should she be taken and I will take your offer into consideration. Shall I teleport you back to our meeting place now or was there something else?"

Sahara had been paraphrasing the conversation and just as Selenka began to say, "No, that is all" Alupis frowned and said, "Wait!"


	6. Chapter 6

"Wait, we can't leave yet," Alupis pleaded, "I have so many more questions. Please? Could we stay just a little bit longer? Could you teach me how to say a few things?"

"Kaleb, I'd like to sit and chat with Alupis for a bit," Sahara said in Russian, "Does everyone have time for this to last a little longer? Maybe have another cup of tea?"

When the group nodded, Sahara turned again to a much more relieved looking Alupis, "Ask away."

"Why do women and men wear the same clothes here? Are men and women considered equals or is one subordinate to the other? Or is it just a matter of fashion?"

"There are powerful men and powerful women. Overall, I'd say the genders are fairly well matched."

"Are you and Kaleb royalty? Are you a queen or a princess or an empress or something? Among the changelings, is BlackEdge royalty? Does being mated to Gregori make me a princess?"

Sahara couldn't help but burst out laughing at her rapid fire string of questions before translating for the others. 

Gregori grinned wide at the translation, "Hell yeah, you're a princess, baby," and kissed her cheek.

"We don't really have royalty anymore," Sahara answered, "I mean, we have rulers, but we don't call them King and Queen anymore and it's not inherited. The Psy used to be ruled by the Council, but now we've moved on to a triple alliance for the Psy between Anthony Kriakus, Nikita Duncan, and Kaleb. What we were discussing earlier, the Trinity Accords, is something that would connect the three races and open up communication between them. Some of the other key members of Trinity are Lucas Hunter, who represents the changelings, Ivy Jane, who represents the Empathic Coalition, and Aden Kai, who's the leader of the Arrows. While BlackEdge is a powerful pack in this territory, I wouldn't say they're royalty. Out of curiosity, why do you ask?"

"Everyone has so many clothes. I've only seen my alpha wear the same shirt twice and it was a rich blue. A lot of the women I see wear purple and the food they serve is very tasty. Gregori took me on a tour and the cook has an entire shelf filled with spices. They even put salt and pepper on all of the tables and you can have as much as you want of it. No, seriously, there is so much food. Between Gregori and my other packmates, I get handed food at least every hour. I haven't been hungry in weeks!"

Sahara had noticed how thin Alupis was, but was trying to find a polite way to ask if it was genetic or a result of something else, "Was there not a lot of food in the Middle Ages?"

"Umm, sort of," Alupis answered, "It depended on who you were. For the lords and higher ups, there was plenty and then as you went lower down the social order there was less."

"What was it like to be one of the common people back then?" Sahara asked, hoping she wasn't coming across as rude or condescending.

"I understand your curiosity, but I left that time behind me very intentionally and now that I'm not there anymore I don't really want to talk at length about it. Plus, I wasn't a commoner for very long." Alupis took a sip of her tea and decided to try another question in the hopes of distracting Sahara from their previous conversation, "What about these black things in the walls? What are they? Are they a really complicated tool or machine or is there a person inside there?" Alupis got up and walked over to point at what she was talking about.

"This is a communication panel. It's a screen that you can call people on and do various other things with. It's kind of like a computer, only... you wouldn't know what that is. Hmm.It's... It's like having your very own group of personal assistants who can find any piece of information for you and do a variety of tasks and pass along messages instantly to whoever you wish."

"Ah, and everyone has one of these?"

"Mostly, yes."

"I see. So instead of having servants, you have this communication panel. And now that everyone enjoys the benefits royalty equally, there are none truly Royal."

"I suppose so," Sahara said a little surprisedly. 

"I'm not dumb. Just because I speak like a child in most languages does not mean I am like them. You understand this, and it is to your benefit. Although I often use this to my advantage in making people underestimate me, I would like to be able to speak like an adult to my mate and permanent Alpha. Would you teach me?"

"Of course," Sahara answered, "I have several demands on my time and I might not always be available, but I want to help you, Alupis. What would you like to learn first?"

Sahara and Alupis practiced basic Russian vocabulary and sentence structuring off to the side while Gregori, Selenka and Kaleb sat drinking the rapidly cooling tea and attempting small talk. Eventually, however, Selenka reached her limit in terms of both and stood to leave. 

"Thank you again for meeting with us on such short notice, Kaleb. I appreciate you taking the time to see us. Sahara, thank you for the tea and your translations. Gregori, Alupis, we should be going."

"You're very welcome, Selenka. Alupis, any last minute questions?" Sahara asked.

"Just one," Alupis nodded and pulled Sahara a little bit away from the rest of the group to whisper something in her ear. Sahara smiled and whispered something back.

Having apparently received her answer, Alupis walked happily back to Gregori's side and held his hand. This time, Kaleb's teleporting them did not not scare her and there was no more screaming or clawing upon their landing back at the clearing.


	7. Chapter 7

Poor Alupis. Gregori couldn't help but feel sorry for his mate right now. When they'd gotten back to the den, Selenka had called all the lieutenants, senior soldiers, and the pack's healer into a meeting to brief them on what Alupis was, what she could do, and the protocols that would be needed in order to protect her. That was all fine with Alupis, of course, until Dasha heard the part about her being from the Middle Ages and started yelling about immunizations and dragged Alupis and Gregori off to the infirmary. 

Gregori had been lucky. The vaccines Dasha wanted to give him were so obscure that she needed to special order them. Alupis, however, was a different story. She received 8 different shots in her arm and backside before Dasha finally called it quits. The healer didn't want to overwhelm Alupis' system with any more than that at one time and promised to give Alupis the rest later. Alupis was scowling and rubbing her injection sites as they finally walked out the door when Dasha called after them.

"One more thing," Dasha addressed Gregori. 

Alupis had made it several steps from the door by that point and though she had stopped, she refused to turn around. 

"She's probably never been to a dentist before, so we'll need to schedule a visit. There's a dental office in town that most of the pups go to and Anton's mate is a hygienist there. I hear she's very gentle. I took the liberty of calling her earlier and she has an opening tomorrow afternoon around two. Will that work for you?"

"I don't have any duties scheduled for then, so I can take her," Gregori rubbed his neck as he thought about his already abused mate sitting through a dental cleaning, "Are you sure she has to go to the dentist?" 

"Gregori Vladimir Vanin. Just because you don't like the dentist does not mean that it's not a necessary part of healthy living. I know how newly mated men can be and I know you think she walks on water and is perfect, but you need to embrace the truth, son," Dasha put her hand on his shoulder and looked him sternly in the eye, "Your mate needs a dentist."

Gregori looked mournfully over at Alupis, who was just now turning to give him a look of 'can we leave yet?'

"Alright," Gregori acceded, "I'll tell her."

Gregori's long strides closed the distance between him and Alupis quickly. As he pulled her in for a hug he thought about how strange it was that not that long ago, she wasn't his mate yet. Now they spent so much time touching that even a short time away from her skin felt strange. He kissed her cheek and sent images through the bond that spoke of an appointment at two and teeth. Alupis leaned her head against his chest and sent through an image of their shared infirmary beds. 

"Oh, I've got something better for you, Princess," Gregori grinned, "We're going home."

Now that she'd healed and shifted, Dasha had officially released her from the infirmary. So instead of turning down the row of hospital beds, Gregori led Alupis through the den until they reached the door of their new quarters. Turning the knob just enough to get past the latch, Gregori scooped his mate into his arms and kicked the door the rest of the way open. Damn, he loved it when she laughed. 

As Gregori carried her into the room, Alupis took in her new surroundings. To his credit, Gregori didn't just carry her straight to the bed. Even though his eyes kept darting towards a certain hallway like a child trying to ignore a piece of cake, he gave her a full tour of the apartment. The main door opened into a small living room with comfortable, practical looking furniture. In between two large bookshelves, a communications panel was mounted onto the wall above a cheery fireplace. At least some things never change, Alupis thought comfortingly to herself. Fire is always the same.

A nice sized kitchen was separated from the living room by a long countertop with chairs on either side. Gregori nodded towards a room as they passed it to let her know that it was the bathroom and then continued on down the hall. There were probably other rooms too, but Alupis didn't really care at this point. 

For the first time in her life, her Psy and Changeling halves didn't have to fight over whether she could indulge in intimate skin privileges. Her Psy knew that trying to stay aloof and unattached was a ridiculous impossibility when it came to Gregori and the wolf in her was looking forward to being able to indulge without any guilt or regret the next morning. It had been a hard balance, and one that really had no good outcome for her. It was hard to have sex with someone without becoming attached to them, but if she became too emotionally involved and something happened to them, she could lose control of her powers. Or at least, that's what she'd always told herself.

But now she had Gregori, and she was never going to leave him. He would be her anchor and she would tie herself to him in every way possible and he would keep her put right here right now. This was her time. It didn't matter what she had to do to stay here. This was her forever and she was damn well going to live every second of it. She grabbed Gregori's shirt collar in her fist and pulled herself closer to his ear.

"я люблю тебя" Alupis whispered, only her broken Russian made it sound more like "Ya blue blue tibia."

"I love you too,"Gregori answered as if it was the truest thing he'd ever spoken. 

↞ ※ ↠

Early afternoon sunshine was streaming through the simulated light window by the time Gregori finally convinced himself to get up off the floor. Even with how uncomfortably hard the floor was compared to the bed, Alupis seemed to prefer it. Gregori didn't mind. As long as Alupis was involved in some way, he would sleep anywhere. But sadly, they couldn't sleep forever and on today's agenda of not sleeping was going to the dentist. Arguably the worst version of not sleeping, Gregori came to terms with it and army crawled out of the cocoon of silk sheets they'd spent the night tangling and mangling. 

They would definitely need to buy some new things, Gregori smirked as he surveyed the disaster zone that was their bedroom. It was a good thing Alupis liked the floor because the bed had suffered all manner of claw marks. Gregori moved to carefully pull clothes from the dresser that, before last night, didn't lean to one side. After tugging on a pair of jeans (with an audience, of course), he decided on a dark grey v-neck that not only matched his wolf's pelt nicely but would show off the handsome bite mark he sported on his collar bone. 

Alupis stretched lazily on the floor as she watched her mate dress. Damn, he was beautiful. Every inch of him made her want to lick, pet, and bite. If he hadn't gotten dressed so quickly, she might have dragged him down and done just that. As it was, he was fully clothed by the time he came back to stand above her head. Alupis reached up and stroked his calf as she nuzzled her forehead into his heal. She couldn't remember ever being so content. 

He could feel it through their mating bond. The pure, unadulterated bliss he was about to shatter. Part of him still didn't want to make her go, but the more responsible part of him knew that it would be good for her. He might not like it, but looking down at her stretched out, trusting form, he knew he would always do what's best for her. 

"We have to go soon," Gregori said as he took the hand that was on his calf and began pulling her up. When she sat up and stretched contentedly, he couldn't help himself. He dropped down and buried his face in her neck and wrapped his arms around her front. She smelled like an open prairie and cold wind. It was odd. Before Alupis, Gregori would've said that there was no such smell as 'cold wind', but here he sat, happily proved wrong by the waves of tall grasses and cold wind that seemed to billow from her soft black hair. 

"We have to go soon," he mumbled again into the soft junction of her neck and shoulder. Squeezing a little tighter, he pulled them both to a standing position. Hell, her body felt so languid and relaxed against his, he couldn't let her go. So instead he let the blanket fall and held her as he pulled a dress over her head. She complied, for the most part. Ok, so they both got a little distracted, but eventually they were both fully clothed and out the door in time to be not that late for their appointment. 


	8. Chapter 8

Alupis couldn't tell why Gregori seemed so sad and tense. Was it her? Was he not happy with last night? She had broken quite a few of his things, after all. But no, she could remember how he'd felt through the bond last night and that couldn't be it. She snuggled closer under his arm and looked up at him. It couldn't be her who was making Gregori sad. She wouldn't allow it. 

Alupis stroked a small path on his back and was rewarded when his shoulders slowly relaxed. Gregori had brought her to a one story building in town with a cheerful alligator painted on the side with some string in its teeth. Certainly nothing in this room could be causing this reaction in her mate. There were bright colors and children playing on the floor. The woman in head to toe pink who came to escort people down the hall had a kind and cheerful face. Yet when that woman came and called for Alupis, the tension came right back to Gregori's shoulders and all her hard work of gentling him was put to waste. 

The pink lady fulfilled what appeared to be her only job and walked the two of them down the hallway. 

"Could you make sure the tray with stuff on it is covered?" Gregori asked as he paused outside the door she'd stopped at, Alupis held firmly under his arm.

When the woman nodded and went into the room, Gregori turned Alupis and cradled her face in his hands. 

"It's going to be ok," Gregori said in comforting tones. 

Alupis didn't know why, after all, he was the one stressed out. Still, she mirrored his hold on her and repeated the same words to him. 

With that, they walked hand in hand into the room. Alupis was so focused on Gregori that it wasn't until he guided her into the chair at the center of the room that she noticed the decidedly medical looking light hanging above it. Ever helpful, her wolf instantly reminded her of the light that had glared above the operating table as her body had been cut by...

Suddenly, Gregori's hands were on her face again and she was no longer in that room long ago that'd been filled with such pain. 

"Hey. I'm here to protect you and absolutely no one is going to hurt you today."

Alupis took some calming breaths and allowed the intensity in Gregori's eyes to soothe her wolf. Content that Alupis was recovered, Gregori sat back down in his chair over to the side. He may have slid it considerably closer than it was before, but his mate needed him and he needed to be close by.

"Hi, Alupis," the pink lady greeted her, "My name's Kathy and I understand this is your first time getting a cleaning? Well, don't you worry. I'll be doing your dental work today and I promise I'll take good care of you."

Alupis nodded and opened her mouth when pink Kathy directed her to. This isn't so bad, Alupis thought as she relaxed into the reclining chair. All she's doing is sticking her hands in my mouth and moving a little wand thingee around my face and teeth. 

"Alright, Alupis, now that I've completed your dental scans, we're ready to begin the cleaning," Kathy said and withdrew the first curved metal instrument from the covered tray.

Alupis' eyes grew wide as she glanced pointedly at Gregori and then back to the newly armed pink Kathy.

"It's ok," Gregori soothed, "She's safe. She's like Dasha, she just wants to help."

Alupis nodded. Even if she wasn't so sure about this whole Kathy person, she trusted Gregori with her soul. 

To her credit, Alupis successfully battled the flashbacks for a full half hour filled with metal scraping over her teeth. Her trust in Gregori, combined with the constant stroking he sent through the bond, might have even allowed her to sit through the whole appointment. But when Kathy brushed slightly too close to her reddened gums, the taste of blood in her mouth and the scent of it in the air were too much. 

"Back up!" Gregori yelled. It was the only reason Kathy got to keep her fingers. Alupis' wolf had charged to the front, completely ignoring her Psy's calm reasoning of what had happened and why. Her teeth elongated and before she knew it, she was shivering in the corner in full wolf form.

"Shhh, it's ok," Gregori bent and stroked her calmingly. Alupis was ashamed when her wolf only made pathetic whimpering sounds. She was above this. She was a strong, dominant wolf who should not be cowering at anything. 

"No, Kathy, it's not you. She's not afraid of you. Here, come let her smell your hand so she can see you're pack."

"I think I'll stay over here for now. She's not looking too friendly and I intend to keep my hand as it is, thank you."

"That's ok. Hey, Alupis, it's ok. You're ok. I'm right here," Gregori continued to pet Alupis in long, slow strokes, "Do you want to go for a run?" 

Alupis took a few gulping, hiccuping breaths and nodded against his chest. 

"Alright, let's go. You can walk behind me and no one will notice you."

Other people. Right. Shit. Now everyone in the waiting room, all the children, would see she'd lost it and gone wolf.

"Yes, we can wait until you're a little calmer."

After a few minutes of stroking and intentional breathing, she figured she was ready enough. She followed Gregori out the door and slunk low to the ground in a futile effort to appear smaller. She was so embarrassed. All she could think about was getting the last few feet out the door when suddenly, a pair of arms wrapped around her throat and she froze.

"Puppy!"

"I'm so sorry, sir!" a middle aged woman apologized. Had she not been Psy and unaccustomed to showing emotion, she probably would have looked mortified, "Elizabeth, let go of the changeling. It is not a dog. I apologize, my niece is from New York and has never seen a wolf changeling before."

"It's ok, puppy, a lot of people are afraid of the dentist," the little girl was now using one hand to pet her and the other to point at various people around the room, "That girl's afraid, and that boy, and her, and that man too." 

"It's alright, ma'am, my mate has granted her skin privileges" Gregori reassured the woman as Alupis nudged her head deeper against the five year old's hand, "I take it your niece is an empath?"

"You are correct."

"If I might ask, since she's from New York, was she in a part that was effected by the sickness in the Net?"

"Her parents were. My sister was killed in the event and Elizabeth's father has not woken up from his coma, yet."

Gregori glanced back to check on Alupis, who was now rolled onto her back and curved around the little girl giving her the belly rub. 

"I'm sorry to hear that," Gregori replied to Elizabeth's aunt. 

"Elizabeth?" Another dental hygienist appeared at the entrance of the hallway, this one wearing purple scrubs with cupcakes on them.

The girl in question flopped protectively over Alupis, trying in vain to reach her small arms all the way around the wolf's chest, "Can I bring my puppy with me?"

Alupis gave the new hygienist a doe eyed look full of innocent beseechment.

The cupcake lady glanced consideringly between Gregori, the aunt and the giant wolf in the room. 

"It's ok, Olga," Pink Kathy appeared behind her and put a hand on her shoulder, "If the puppy wants to watch over Miss Elizabeth and make sure she's safe, I can finish Alupis' teeth cleaning at the same time." 

Elizabeth squealed a little and cupped her hands by her mouth. In a child's non-whisper, she whispered as Alupis began to stand, "Can I ride on your back?"

"Elizabeth, no..." Her aunt began, but Alupis had already leaned regally down to allow the squirming Elizabeth onto her shoulders. 

Gregori watched as his mate walked proud and head high back into the examination rooms, a new confidence in her limping gait. When she looked back to see if he was coming, he saw in her eyes that her demons would not haunt her now; they were buried under a wave of purpose and protectiveness. He had never been more proud of her. 


	9. Chapter 9

Gregori repositioned the rear view mirror for no less than the twentieth time since they'd left the dentist. Alupis had remained in wolf form even after the cleaning was over and had decided to curl up on the bench seat of the SUV on their way back to the den. Despite the late afternoon sun streaming through the window, Alupis slept peacefully. 

Gregori silently thanked technology for allowing him to be such a distracted driver as he switched back and forth between manual and automatic navigation so he could watch Alupis sleep without endangering her. She was beautiful. He was addicted. A lifetime of staring at her would never be enough. 

As they neared the den, Gregori reluctantly switched back to manual and forced himself to pay attention to the road. He guided the pack vehicle expertly over sections of large boulders and through the "roads" that were really just shallow rocky creeks that hid tire tracks well. Secrecy was safety, and a den must be safe above all else. After they were a safe distance within the perimeter and within a reasonable distance for a run to the den, Gregori pulled over. He had been good for over an hour and he needed to touch her. 

Between the slightly warmer weather and the extra few minutes of sunshine each day, the springtime bugs were alive and thriving in the meadow Gregori had chosen. So instead of opening the doors to get to Alupis, Gregori climbed over the center console and awkwardly tried to maneuver his long frame in between the seats without waking his mate. Eventually, he managed to snuggle in beside her. He buried his face into her fur and breathed in the scent of her. 

Deeply contented, Gregori ran his palm over the length of her body in the caressing and calming way he had when they had only just mated and still shared those two hospital beds. Alupis had come a long way in almost two months. Her ribs were much less noticeable and her coat was now shiny, full, and completely void of fleas and ticks. 

Alupis woke slightly at the petting, but nuzzled deeper into the skin contact with Gregori until she fell into a sleep so deep that even time did not exist. Gregori settled in and closed his eyes. Although he remained alert enough to sense any approaching danger, the rest of him sank into the comfort of being completely, wholly, and utterly together. 

The sun's rays grew softer as dusk approached and their quiet meadow became a crossroads for animals going home or just waking up. The grass ruffled as a small group of lemmings followed after their leader. In the distance, Gregori could hear a herd of elk gently calling to their calves. The wind changed and the tall grasses swayed away from the vehicle. The once gentle mewing of a cow elk changed to the bark of warning that let Gregori know the herd had scented wolf. 

In all this, Alupis slept peacefully in his arms, but Gregori could sense her growing hunger through their mating bond and knew she would be ravenous when she eventually woke up. Carefully and quietly, he detached himself and made his way back to the den. If he was fast enough, he could be there and back with dinner before she even knew he was gone. 

↞ ※ ↠

" _Exsuscito, Lupus,"_ the all too familiar voice whispered in her mind, " _Wake up."_

Her mouth felt like it had been filled with cotton wool. Wrong time, this was the wrong time. When? What? Where was she? The confused and sleep drunk thoughts swirled in her head as her mutinous brain kept bringing her back to this moment.

She couldn't feel her hands. The straps were too tight. She couldn't fully take in the gulping breaths her body demanded in its panicked state. The belt across her chest that held her to the table during the non-torso related inquiries was pulled taut. She tried to bang her head against the table to clear her thoughts, but couldn't lift her head. She opened her eyes and blinked violently against the light. 

A man dressed in long, red robes underneath a white smock stood before her. Hands clasped behind his back in a deceptively calm stance, there was nothing benevolent or harmless in the cold depths of his Cardinal eyes. 

" _Did you enjoy your dream, mongrel?"_

↞ ※ ↠ 

Gregori was about 300 meters from the den when it felt like his skin was being ripped from his body. Doubling over in pain, he put down the plates of food before he could drop them. A second later, his skin was fine, but his nails were being ripped out and his forearm crushed into a thousand pieces. A breath and some silent gratitude for having saved the food later, he was fine. A line of white fire sliced along the center of his chest and a truth finally clicked.

"Alupis!" 

By the time the shout escaped his throat, he was already hurtling to her rescue. It was the fastest he had ever run, but it still took him an agonizing five minutes to get to her. When he finally reached the vehicle, he nearly ripped the door off its hinges. 

Alupis was shaking all over and spontaneously partial-shifting different parts of her body. If he hadn't known better, he would've said she'd taken Jax. Although he'd never met a changeling who'd taken Jax, he'd heard the rumors that the drug messed with changeling biology so much that it left the user trapped in various stages of the shift and in excruciating pain. 

While the symptoms fit, he knew every procedure and drug that had been administered to her since the moment he found her. Jax was not one of them. Both man and beast were nearly beside themselves at the fact that his mate was lying there in so much pain and he knew jack shit about how to help her. Out of instinct, he grabbed her by the shoulders and dragged her from the car. Reaching out with his body and mind, he wrapped himself around her in every way he possibly could. 

_Stop hurting,_ he begged. 

Despite the vice of Gregori's arms around her, Alupis managed the kind of gulping, giant breath of someone who'd been drowning. Gregori didn't let go and didn't loosen his grip, but the tense rigidness of his muscles relaxed the tiniest bit. Her body went back to being fully Psy again as her mind came back to the present with each gasping breath.

Her face was all tingly and her nerves were completely shot. She was not a crier. She would not cry. Her face was wet, but... It was ok. Gregori was real and he was not just some dream planted in her mind by a high level telepath. She rolled until he was all but crushing her into the ground. Real. He was real.

"What the hell was that?" Gregori asked.

"I'm sorry," Alupis sniffled, "bad dream."

Gregori rubbed her arm. Not satisfied, he pressed, "The shift? Why were you in so much pain?" Nuzzling his face into her hair, he added, "I felt it."

Something inside her twisted and it felt worse than the nightmare had. She'd shifted and hadn't shielded her mate from it. How could she have done that to him? Her breath was coming in hiccups now and she had no control over her body. Mates weren't supposed to hurt each other. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Alupis clung impossibly tighter to Gregori, incapable of saying anything else or accepting the shushing noises Gregori was making in her ear. It was not ok. It would never be ok. She would never do it ever again, but even once was too much. She had been so careful to shield the bond every other time she'd shifted around him. He was never supposed to find out what it felt like for her. Above her, Gregori grew very still.

"Is that what normal shifting is like for you?" 

It was barely audible, but she heard it. Her throat now long since out of her conscious control, all she could do was dip her head a little further down into his chest. Gregori didn't say anything else after that. He simply held her until she had recovered enough to sit up and walk back to where he'd left their dinner. Some of the juveniles had apparently found it in the meantime and demolished it, so they brought the plates back to the kitchen and took some communal leftovers out of the fridge. 

Once back in the apartment, Gregori didn't break physical contact or speak a word until after he had finished heating up dinner and filling the tub with bubble bath for Alupis. Kissing her head affectionately, he murmured something about a patrol and left her to undress and soak in the warm water. 


	10. Chapter 10

Selenka was an hour into her workout and had just worked up a nice glistening sweat when Gregori walked into the training room. 

"I need to fight. You got a minute?"

Selenka dropped down from the bar she'd been doing pull-ups on and took in the sight of her lieutenant. His light grey shirt was streaked with sweat and covered in the fine grains of pollen that let Selenka know he'd been running outside in human form. 

"Sure. I guess I have time enough to kick your ass." Selenka stood calmly, knowing that in his current state, Gregori was sure to make the first move. When he lunged at her in raw fury, it was a simple enough maneuver to side step and catch him by the clawed hand. A slight flick of her wrist and Gregori was on the floor.

Rolling back into an upright position, Gregori attacked again, this time with a little less momentum. Selenka blocked most of his blows and landed several of her own, but she had made Gregori a lieutenant for a lot of good reasons and his fighting ability was one of them. She might be the alpha, but he wasn't far behind her in skill. 

After a solid half hour of round house kicks, punching and grappling, Gregori finally got tired enough to admit what he was really fighting. Tapping out of the hold Selenka had him in, he walked over to the water station with his hands above his head. After a long drink, his shoulders tensed and then sagged. 

"Alupis hurts when she shifts and I can't help her," Gregori said without turning towards her.

Selenka knew better than to say anything yet. 

Shoulders tensed again, Gregori continued, "Even her goddamn claws hurt her, but she never said anything. She lied to me and fucking hid it from me."

Selenka waited a beat and was about to chime in when the lieutenant's shoulders sagged again and he stole the words right out of her mouth as he said, "But there's no point to me knowing about it because I can't do anything to help her. And now it's eating at me and I just want to fight it and fix it and I can't. What could I do? Ask her to never shift again? I won't! I can't! She's a wolf and I can't ask her to deny that part of herself. It would be wrong. But what do I have left? She told me she shields the bond so I won't feel it when she shifts but that's almost worse. I'll know. I'll KNOW that she's in pain and suffering all alone just like she's already done for too goddamn much of her life," Gregori took a deep breath, "And the worst part is, I almost wish I didn't know, because then I could run with my beautiful, sexy wolf and not have this nagging thought in my head about what that moment cost her. And I could hold my gorgeous Psy and touch her skin without the memory of how it feels like it's being ripped off during a shift. But I can't. I know, and I will always know."

At this point, Gregori had sat down on the bench next to the water. Selenka took a seat next to him and absorbed what Gregori had just told her. 

"Selenka, I don't know what I can do. She's my mate. It's my job to protect her and keep her from getting hurt. How do I do that when she's the one hurting herself and she only does it when she needs to as part of her normal, healthy, changeling life?"

"Gregori," Selenka started, "I think you need to take a vacation." 

Selenka held up a hand to stop the protest he probably would have made had he not been too busy looking offended. "I hear that the Sierra Nevadas are very relaxing in the spring and you look very tense. Since Alupis is still scheduled to visit Lucas Hunter, you will be in the area anyway. I've already asked Hawke's permission for you to stay in SnowDancer territory during your stay. I'm sure he won't mind my asking for you to stay in the area a bit longer."

Gregori made a sputtering noise, but remained quiet at the direction of his alpha.

"While I do not know the specifics," Selenka continued," I have heard rumors about several adult cats in the area who only recently learned how to shift. If you ask Lucas Hunter very nicely, I don't see why he would refuse a meeting between those cats and Alupis. I know she is your special flower and one of a kind, but the act of shifting might just be universal enough for them to teach her something."

Gregori's face stilled for a moment. Taking in Selenka's words, he was again impressed at the way his alpha handled things in BlackEdge. Gregori suddenly realized that she had been planning this since the moment Alupis had such trouble shifting back into human, well, Psy, form in the infirmary. She might not have known the specifics, but Selenka had seen Alupis' pain before even he did and went out of her way to help Alupis.

Gregori didn't touch easily with anyone outside of Alupis, but he wrapped his arms around his alpha and held on for a solid minute. With a peck to her cheek and a clap to her sweaty shoulders, Gregori ran off in the direction of the family quarters.  

↞ ※ ↠

Alupis raised her hands from the water and examined the extensive wrinkles that now decorated her skin. It was just a matter of time before her body would be this wrinkled even without the water. Maybe it was her ability or the fact that she'd watched so many people and empires grow old and die, but the passing of time and mortality did nothing to phase Alupis. Instead, she reached up and ran just a little more hot water into the tub to heat it up again. The bubbles were almost gone, but the comfort of being surrounded by the touch of warm water was a pleasure she would not deny herself. Of course, there was another warm touch she wouldn't mind right now, but he was still out on patrol.

Almost as if her thoughts had summoned him, Gregori opened the door to the bathroom and walked in. Alupis' languid body was suddenly wide awake, her wolf sitting straight up at the sight and scent of her mate. Smiling, Gregori seemed about to say something as he leaned down over the tub. _Too bad for him_ , Alupis thought as she reached up and pulled him down with a kiss. Water spilled over the side of the extra large tub as Gregori went willingly fully clothed into the warm water. 

"I'm sorry, I'm all sweaty," Gregori said when he finally got a second to breathe. 

Alupis pulled the wet t-shirt from his back and reached over for the soap. "I help you," she replied with limited Russian but unlimited sultriness in her eyes, "Dirty." She spent the next twenty minutes stripping and lathering Gregori before she insisted on a rinse and repeat. Of course, he repaid the favor with some suds-ing of his own and by the end of it, they were both very clean. The bathroom floor, however, was a completely different story. After drying each other off, Gregori dropped the towels on the floor and tried to sop up at least a little bit of the water they'd splashed out. 

The task done, Gregori joined Alupis where she sprawled comfortably naked on their bed. Molding his body into hers, he absentmindedly traced her scars and her curves interchangeably. 

"I spoke with Selenka tonight," he started the conversation he'd been trying to start earlier, "She thinks there might be some changelings in San Fransisco who can help you with your shifting."

He felt her body unexpectedly stiffen a little bit. 

"What's the matter?" Gregori asked with big puppy dog eyes, he'd thought she'd be excited about the idea. 

Kissing him to assuage the hurt her reaction had caused him, Alupis took a moment before sending her answer through their bond. "I'm sorry my shifting hurts you and I'm sorry it hurts me. But I can't change this, Gregori."

"How do you know? What if they could teach you something to make it easier? Even if it was one small thing. Wouldn't even a little less pain make the whole trip worth it?"

Alupis hesitated. 

Gregori held her tighter, "I hate seeing you in pain. I know it's not your fault and I know it's not totally in our control, but my wolf needs to try. I can't handle knowing that my mate is suffering while I just stand by, doing nothing. Please, Alupis. Let me do something. I know it might not work, but I need to at least try something to help you. I love you, Alupis."

"Ok," she relented. Although she was in no way convinced that these San Fransisco changelings would make any difference, she would never say no to this man who held her heart so gently, especially when he asked with such nice, petting strokes. Yes, it would be painful to try to force the shift, but if it meant that Gregori had even an ounce more peace about her shifting, it'd be worth it. He might not have said it directly, but Alupis could tell that his wolf was very much disturbed by the feel of her un-evolved shifting. 

Truth be told, Alupis wasn't very fond of it either. In all her years of practice, Alupis had never once been able to reproduce that seemingly effortless glitter of a change she'd seen and felt in Gregori's shift. Pleasure-pain for two seconds? Such things were apparently too good for people like Alupis. Still, she'd come to accept it. With the passing of time and a few crisis bonding moments between her Psy and her wolf halves, she'd even reached a point where her Psy no longer blamed or punished the wolf for the pain of the shift. She'd embraced it, and, honestly, that was probably the most mentally healthy thing she'd ever done in her entire life.

Gregori might be asking her to learn to limit the pain, but that didn't mean she still couldn't embrace the pain that remained. Yes. She would do this. If it meant more comfort for Gregori, she would do anything. Alupis let the last bit of tension seep from her muscles and fell into a light and gentle sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Alupis has a panic attack in this chapter as a result of her PTSD.

Since Alupis had no photo ID and Gregori had no intention of getting her something that could allow enemies to identify her, the pack ended up chartering a private jet for their journey to San Francisco. When they landed at the airport, two SnowDancers were there to pick them up. It was a rather long drive from the bustling city of Frisco up into the romantically lonely Sierras, but they passed it quietly. Alupis and Gregori rode mostly in silence, the seven hour time difference making it feel much later at night to their bodies than it truly was in that part of the world. The SnowDancer soldiers didn't seem to mind. The two males didn't know much about their car ride companions and seemed content to keep it that way. 

Once they'd made it to the very well hidden den, they met briefly with Hawke so that the others would scent their Alpha on them and not attack them as unlawful intruders. Though Dire wolves apparently didn't mind the occasional stray, _regular_ wolves were very antagonistic when it came to uninvited guests. Deathly so. 

Shown to their room, the mated pair collapsed for a few hours before their bodies inappropriately woke them at 3am. Finding a way to exhaust themselves enough to get back to sleep, they eventually succeeded in resting enough to be ready for their tour of the den the next morning. 

Right on time, a gentle knock sounded on their door. 

"Hello, I'm Toby. Are you ready for your tour?"

"Yes," Gregori answered as he held the door open for their young guest, "Just let me see if Alupis is ready yet."

Alupis appeared a few moments later, pulling a wine colored chunky cardigan around her shoulders. Her movements stopped for a brief second as she took in the sight of their guest. It was only a momentary hesitation, but it was so utterly non-Psy that the young SnowDancer couldn't help but notice. 

"So, how long have you been out from under silence?" Toby asked inquisitively. The thought that this was both a very personal and slightly awkward question didn't occur to his teenage mind until after the words left his tongue. Although Toby Lauren was a cardinal telepath, his Empathic senses were strong enough to pick up Alupis' negative emotions towards him. "I'm sorry, that was rude. You don't have to answer that."

Alupis squinted back and forth between Gregori and Toby before replying, "I... was never mute?"

Toby wasn't quite sure what to do with that answer, but eventually decided to drop the subject and move on. Based on the heavy Russian accent they both spoke with, maybe she simply hadn't understood the question. Yes, that was logical. 

"Well, I think we should begin the tour now so that you can know where everything is," Toby said as he lead the way out the door and through the den.

_Gregori, why is he so old?_

_Who? Toby? He looks like he's fourteen._

_Yes. Exactly. I thought most packs assigned juveniles the job of showing around guests._

_Alupis, he_ is _a juvenile._

_???_

_Wait, how old did people used to be before they were considered an adult._

_A year after puberty._

_WHAT?_

_What? If you are old enough to make babies you are no longer baby._

_But... that's so young!_

_Pftch, maybe to you. People die much slower these days. When I was fifteen, I thought I was halfway to my grave by then._ Alupis smirked and squeezed Gregori's hand a little tighter. _But now, I'm glad I was wrong._

Toby led the Russian visitors expertly through the intricate layout of the den, pausing every now and then to explain in detail any interesting painting or other facet of the den. Although Alupis didn't understand some of the words he used, she got the sense that he had spent a lot of time alone in order to research, write, and memorize all of it in preparation for this exact moment. Forty five minutes later, Alupis scented fresh air and knew they were moving closer to one of the den's hidden exits. 

"Alupis," Toby began as they drew ever closer to the outdoors, "Can I ask you a question? Why do you dislike me?"

Alupis sighed and made a face. "It is not that I do not like you. I have nothing against you personally. I simply do not get attached to dry dust and bones. Some day soon, you will die and that is all that will be left of you."

"True, but you must have some friends. What about Gregori? You obviously care for him."

"Yes," smiled and reached up to give Gregori butterfly kisses, "He is my favorite piece of dust. He and I will be dust together at the same time."

Toby nodded awkwardly.

"With you, I do not know when you will be dust," Alupis shrugged and pointed to Toby's cardinal eyes, "I take it you are an empath?"

Toby nodded and continued walking them towards the exit, "Empathy is a secondary ability for me, but it's become a lot stronger since my family joined the pack. My primary ability is telepathy."

Gregori almost walked into Toby as both he and Alupis abruptly stiffened and stopped. Fear. Mistrust. Both emotions were palpable as Alupis' grip tightened furiously on Gregori's hand.

"What? Why?" Toby looked confused and extremely disconcerted.

"The door is that way, yes?" Alupis spoke with a false steel in her quiet voice, "I think Gregori and I can find it from here. It will be good for us to run it ourselves. We will learn it faster that way."

Without waiting for a response, Alupis pulled Gregori forward, moving so that she would be by the wall as they went around Toby. The door was only twenty feet forward, so they were soon flooded by the bright afternoon sun as they made their way through the White Zone. Pups played tag and other games in the safe inner perimeter. Most were too absorbed in their play to notice the newcomers, but a few turned to watch as the pair walked quickly into the woods. 

Alupis was breathing heavily and shaking by the time they made it to the tree cover. 

"Alupis, talk to me," Gregori ordered. 

Her mouth opened, but no words would come out. Her teeth shifted involuntarily and she didn't know what to do with her hands until she began clutching to Gregori. Her deep gasps became wheezy as her vision began darkening around the edges. What remained at the center of her eyesight suddenly became crisper and she knew her eyes had changed as well. 

Gregori didn't know what to do, didn't know what had caused this freak out, and didn't know how to help. His mate's claws ripped holes where she'd been holding on to his shirt. Her shaking had become so violent that he feared she was about to have a full seizure.

Gripping her by the arms, Gregori gave the only command he thought might help her. Reaching for every bit of his dominance, he said, "Run."

Alupis took off like a bullet. The territory was new to them both, but that didn't slow Alupis as she sprinted over roots and boulders. Once, her boot caught on a raised root and she went flying onto the forest floor, but that only stopped her for a second before she was up and running again, adrenaline muting the pain receptors in her scraped hands and knees. 

She didn't stop or slow down her frenzied pace until they came to a wide alpine meadow. Alupis collapsed on all fours and drank in the smell of tall grasses in the late spring air. Gregori sat down next to her, checking her over to see if she was ok. Her limbs still shook slightly, but her eyes had lost that crazed animal look they'd had in the woods. Her lungs still gasped for air, but after a run like that, it made sense. For all her changeling strength and stamina, Alupis was still recovering and had a long way left to go in her physical therapy. 

"How is your foot?" Gregori asked.

_It hurts, but it's ok._

"And your hands? Let me see them." When Alupis sat up, he pulled her hands into his and inspected the scrapes. They were filled with dirt, but they seemed fairly shallow. He gently brushed some of the larger bits of forest floor from the wound before turning her hand over to kiss an undamaged section of skin.

_I'm sorry_ , Alupis sent through their bond. 

"What for?"

_I don't know. I'm sorry for scaring you. I'm sorry for freaking out. I'm sorry you had to see that and I'm sorry that I can't control that better._

Gregori pressed a tender kiss to Alupis' cheek and pulled her close until she was snuggled into his chest. He held her until the last of her trembling had subsided and both of their heartbeats had returned to normal. 

"I want you to show me." Gregori said quietly. 

_Show you what?_

"I want every part of you, Alupis. I need to know what happened to you in the past. I can't continue walking around, not knowing what your triggers will be or how I can help you. I need to know. 

That part of Alupis' memory had been deliberately and forcefully imprisoned in a box she never allowed her mind to open. Certain memories were kept as inmates and allowed no freedom except for when the guards fell asleep at night. The visions and echoes of that pain drenched room were the worst and most violent offenders by far. Still, this was Gregori. He owned her and she owned him. 

In an act of trust she couldn't allow her conscious mind to think about for too long, she dragged that box of memories to the very edge of the mating bond that connected their minds. 

_I won't give you first person access, so don't ask._

_Only send what you can handle. If it gets too much for you, pull back._

Sensing Alupis wanted to be in a more comfortable position, Gregori leaned back until he was lying down, Alupis' head and body still resting on his chest. Leveraging herself up for a moment, she pulled her own shirt off before tugging at the hem of Gregori's shirt until she could fit under it. Skin to skin and held deliciously close by the tensile strength of the cotton fabric, she allowed the feel of Gregori and safety to envelope her body as her mind descended into hell. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know it's a little odd that Alupis and Gregori were allowed to stay in the SnowDancer den since its location and entrances are closely guarded secrets. However, SnowDancer and BlackEdge are on very good terms and Hawke knows that there's no issue of BlackEdge trying to take over the den or sell them out to the Psy. Even though they're not allies, I feel there's enough trust there to allow it.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter has a brief and non-successful attempted rape scene, then she kicks his ass.

Alupis closed her eyes and opened them on the psychic plane. As always, she found herself in the wide open grasslands she grew up in with the sky above painted the fiery red of sunset. Brushing her hand along the tallest stalks, she tugged Gregori gently through the mating bond. Although his full consciousness was divided between his own mind and hers, it was enough for him to see everything Alupis was seeing. 

According to other Psy, her mind did not look right. Or at least, it didn't look like a normal Psy mind. Instead of bright lights interconnected by multihued threads, her mind grounded itself in times. Or, more specifically, places and times. Both were so instinctual that her mind refused to organize things in any other way. 

Reaching out telepathically, Alupis invited Gregori to run with her through the tall, waving grasses. Words could not express what it felt like to have her protective, strong, sexy mate running with her in such an intimate place. She had never before allowed anyone to join her here voluntarily. Somehow, the experience both broke something and healed her at the same time. 

_Where do these paths lead?_ Gregori's mind brushed against hers as he gestured to the narrow rabbit trails that had been worn through the prairie. 

_Mostly nowhere. They used to be people I was connected to in some way. Eventually they will fade away from disuse._ Mentally spinning around with a smile she motioned back towards the way they came. _See that one?_

_The road?_

Rubbing her mind lovingly against Gregori's she said, _That's you,_ before running off again. 

As Gregori gave chase, he took note of his surroundings. Every now and then, their location would glimmer and shift until they were on the outskirts of an entirely new and interesting place. The meadow with a small village in the distance was only the beginning. Gregori already knew he'd mated with the most incredible woman on the planet, but seeing Pyramids and the Colosseum and other ancient looking architecture first hand made him realize anew that there was MUCH more to his gorgeous, resilient wolf than met the eye. He was so distracted by the scenery that it took him a while before he realized something. 

_Why is this taking so long? Are you taking us the long way?_

_... Maybe._

_We've been running for a very long time. Aren't you tired?_

_No. Traveling to places within my own mind doesn't burn any psychic calories._

_Right. This is your mind, you control it. Can't we just go straight there?_

Alupis sighed against the skin of Gregori's chest. _That was my plan originally, but it was such fun running with you and I'm not particularly looking forward to where we're heading._

_We have time,_ Gregori said on the mental plane while stroking her on the physical one, _I'm enjoying the history lesson._

Alupis' only reply was to continue on in her loop of temporal-geographical memory constructs. She hadn't gotten too far before Gregori interrupted again. 

_Alupis._

_Gregori?_

_I want to teach you a lesson._

_...? Oh, you mean in bedroom?_

_No, although later, yes. But don't distract me, this is important._ Alupis' mind stilled beside Gregori's as he held her close. _In each of these locations, we're always on the outskirts. We've been running through centuries, Princess, and the only place I saw many connections was back in the meadow. You're not alone anymore, baby, and you don't need to live on the fringe._

Alupis didn't say anything at first. She simply held on to Gregori and stared off in the distance. Just when Gregori was about to suggest they get back to running, the world shifted again. _I'm not sure I can handle living like that again._

 

Alupis' conscious mind turned from where it'd been snuggled with Gregori's. This was what he had come here for, she told herself. We are here because of Gregori and we will go inside because he wants us to and he's going to come the hell with us. 

_Damn right, I am._

_Oh, you weren't supposed to hear that._

_It's ok, Princess. I promise I will protect you. I don't care what I want, if you get overwhelmed, we leave. Do you understand?_

_Yes, Mate._

_Good._

 

As with the other sections of her memory, her mind had selected a dominant place within which to categorize all other memories from that time. This one was a prison. A bit melodramatic, in her opinion, since not every memory caged here was actually an unpleasant one. However, she didn't think it'd be worth the effort to change what her subconscious had built. Besides, she never came to this section anyways. 

 

Gregori was surprised when, upon entering through the gateway, they found themselves in another meadow instead of the dungeon steps he had anticipated. 

_These_ are _the steps. They're the memories that lead down to the events you asked about._

As Alupis walked pointedly onward, Gregori took in the snatches of memory he could catch as they pushed forward. Most of it was typical den life, maternal dominants disciplining the juveniles, pups scampering about, wolves sparring. In all the memories, there was only one character notably missing: the alpha. 

_He was a jerk and I have chosen to erase him from my willful memories. That scumbag doesn't deserve to live on in anyone's mind, but especially not mine. Jackass._ The telepathic thoughts held a growling undertone from her wolf. 

_This is the only one my brain won't let me forget._

The meadow was dark and preternaturally quiet. A couple, Alupis and a tall, stocky man came into view. 

"How come you haven't slept with me yet?" 

"Because I don't want to."

"You're a wolf, aren't you sky-eyes? Or is that just what you told us so you could get close to me?"

Gregori's wolf growled on both planes. 

"Smell me."

"I intend to," the male said, his wolf flickering night-glow in his eyes.

The memory skipped a bit and Gregori realized it was for his sake. He really fucking didn't want to see this. 

"I said no!" memory Alupis slashed her claws viciously across the man's face. 

The male grabbed her wrists in a white-knuckled grip. "Say yes," it was the can't-say-no-to command of an Alpha.

_Fuck. Alupis, I'm so sorry. You don't have to relive this. It wasn't your fault and it wasn't your choice, baby._

Her reply came back with the hint of a smile to it, _No, no, just wait. It gets better._

The rage in the eyes of past Alupis was a violent storm within, never breaking contact with the smug Alpha who thought he could use his dominance to abuse a packmate. 

_Dire wolves have fluid dominance._

Suddenly, the night exploded in a cacophony of violence. Vicious snarles intermixed with whimpering shrieks and the sound of fur being ripped out and claws slicing through flesh. 

_You fucking challenged the Alpha???_

_Well, technically this was the second time. All new packmates fight the Alpha initially in order to join, but I wasn't really trying hard. Plus, I hadn't decided how long I wanted to stay, so my rank didn't really matter to me._

_Can you make it brighter? I want to watch you beat the crap out of this guy._

_Sure._

The memory took on the night-vision glow of her wolf. The Alpha had shifted into his wolf's brown and lanky form. Alupis, however, had only shifted her teeth and claws. No way was this a fair fight. The Alpha lunged for her throat, but Alupis sidestepped and used his momentum against him, simultaneously flipping and slicing him. She reached for something on the meadow floor, which appeared to be a long wooden staff with two notches cut in the ends.

_Whack!_ The staff made a horrible cracking sound as it met the Alpha's jaw. Certain it was her weapon that had broken, Gregori tensed as he watched his mate face down her attacker. It didn't matter that this was a memory and his Alupis was standing safe and sound by his side. Gregori wanted to fucking tear that man apart. 

To make things worse, the Alpha managed to swipe his claws along a large section of Alupis' side before head butting her so hard he heard at least a few ribs crack and the air rush from her lungs. Standing dominantly above her, he growled the command for her to stand down and accept a lowered rank as punishment. It was a little garbled from the way his jaw hung slightly off-kilter, but the meaning was clear.

Alupis laid on the ground, gasping for air for a long while. Then, somehow, she managed to roll onto all fours. _This was not my favorite fight._ Catching her breath only slightly, she raised her head in what the Alpha undoubtedly thought would be an admission of defeat. Only, instead of surrender, he got a face full of grass while Alupis grabbed a hidden dagger from her ankle scabbard and slashed upward. Her blade might have missed his carotid artery, but the cut bled heavily enough to distract the Alpha as Alupis darted away from his slashing claws. 

Scrambling back to the stick that turned out to not be broken, she grabbed both ends and bent the wood nearly in half with a powerful thrust of her legs. Notching the string to her bow with a practiced move of her teeth, she grabbed an arrow from apparently nowhere and had it aimed at the Alpha's head before he had fully recovered from her knife attack. 

"No," Alupis said with just as much dominance in her voice as the Alpha, "You back down."

The memory faded with the previous Alpha running off into the darkness. 

_You were fucking ALPHA?_

_For about a month, yes._

_Why? What happened after a month?_

_That memory is at the end of the stairs. If you don't mind, I'd actually like to skip that one. Louis, the previous Alpha, was a sore loser. He eventually betrayed the pack and gave away our den's location so he could sell me to the Cardinals._

A growl rumbled from deep within Gregori's chest, every fiber of his being screaming this was wrong. What kind of Alpha tries to rape a packmate? And to sell out the den and jeopardize the safety of pups? Who fucking does that?!

_It doesn't get any better from here._

_I'm ready, baby. I can face your demons if you can. But if you need to stop, I'll understand. You pull out whenever you need to._

Past Alupis appeared in front of them. Her arms, legs, and torso were strapped in multiple places to keep her completely immobilized on a cold metal table. The whole contraption was angled slightly downward so that any liquid would eventually drip into a bucket at her feet. Unlike the meadow they'd just come from, this scenery felt very befitting of the dark medieval castle-church-dungeon-looking facade her mind had made for these memories. Candles lit the dank and musty stone room, but the flames did almost nothing to heat the room. Despite a natural changeling tolerance for cold weather, her bared flesh was prickled with goosebumps and her nipples drawn into tight peaks. 

_I will warn you, my mind has intentionally erased parts of what happened in this room. Some portions are more like echoes of emotions rather than actual events. I remember a lot of pain and fear and smells, but after a while the memory of one cut becomes no different from that of any other._

Gregori didn't trust his voice enough to respond to that, but he couldn't stop the growl.

A short man made his way into the room, the sounds preceding his entrance betraying the fact that Alupis had been housed behind not one, but several heavily barricaded metal doors.

"Hello, Alupis," the man clasped his hands together so they were hidden under the wide sleeves of his solid red robe, "My name is Dgenero. It's nice to finally meet you. My colleagues and I have been waiting very patiently and we would like to ask you some questions that only you can answer." Taking a seat on the chair a soldier had brought in, he began in the same light tone he'd used for his introduction, "Let's start with something easy. Are you Psy?"

Alupis' night sky eyes stared back at him in response. 

_He's a V-Psy._

_V? So he's a teleporter?_

_What? Oh, no, not Tk-V. Just V. He's a Veritas Psy. It's a sub designation of Empathy. It means he can tell when anyone is lying and manipulate people into telling the truth. Empathy Psy can sense and influence emotion, but the Veritas E's are especially sensitive to emotions tied to honesty and trust so they can use that against people._

_You make it sound like Empaths are terrible people._

_No, I don't think all Empaths are terrible people. I just know better than to think that they are all perfect sunshine gods._

_I guess that's fair enough._

"What about changeling? Are you a changeling, Alupis?"

Alupis managed to continue her aggressive staring for a while longer, but Gregori could see the emotions on her face start to shift. She pressed her lips together in a tight line to keep from speaking, but her eyes shifted into the deep golden brown of her wolf. 

"Thank you," Dgenero said as he scribbled down his notes, "Let us continue. You are obviously a very powerful individual. Tell me, what is your designation?"

"I don't know."

"Hmm, that's odd. Don't worry, Alupis. I give you my word that my colleagues and I will help you figure out what it is you can do. In the mean time, I will write a note here to have our analyst give you the common assessment. Next, our data tells us that you have been in this area for roughly six months. Where were you before this?"

Alupis said nothing for a solid half hour while the Cardinal V-Psy waited. 

"Rome."

"Thank you, Alupis. Now, who were your parents? Was it your mother who was Psy or your father?"

"You don't know them."

"No, I'm sure I don't. But which one of your parents gave you those eyes? They must be very powerful if their strength was able to withstand the mixing in of wolf blood."

Alupis kept her silence for another twenty five minutes, "Neither of my parents were Psy."

"Yes or no, was your mother Psy?"

"No."

"Was your father Psy?"

"No."

"Did your mother have any close male friends who were Psy?"

Alupis' growl shook the room as her eyes and teeth shifted. Had she not been strapped down, Dgenero would be dead. 

"Interesting. You are telling an unbelievable truth," more scribbling before Dgenero asked, "Where did you inherit your abilities?"

Twenty minutes later, "I don't know."

"To your knowledge, has your changeling blood impacted or limited your Psychic ability, whatever it may be?"

The wait time between questions was getting significantly shorter, "No... and yes."

"Explain yourself."

"My wolf can keep me from using my ability but only if I give over control of my mind."

"Interesting. Can your Psy blood keep your wolf from shifting if the Psy portion of your mind is in control?"

"I have found that all changelings can control their shifts these days."

"That appears true, but it is always good to verify things. Still, you're hiding something from me. What is it?"

This time Alupis held out for a full two hours before whispering, "My wolf..."

"What about your wolf?"

"My wolf can't shift."

"That's not completely true. Tell me, what parts of your body are able to shift?"

An hour later, "My eyes and claws can shift the most easily. With effort, I can get my teeth and sometimes my whole head, but I've never been able to get much further than that. It hurts to shift, but it hurts to not shift. I am a changeling. I am a wolf, but I can't get out."

Dgenero wrote things down for about five minutes, apparently gleaning much more from Alupis' statement than just what she had said. 

"Do you think of yourself more as a Psy or more as a Changeling?"

"I love my pack. I have spent years living with wolf changelings, and while some of them might be shitheads, the majority of them are good people."

"And your thoughts on the other half of your heritage?"

"The Psy are too extreme. Either they have no control of their abilities and hurt the ones they love or they have such strong control it makes them cold and hard. In my experience, the cold ones become obsessed with control to the extreme that they use their powers to manipulate and gain control of others."

"I see. Do you hate yourself for being one of the Psy?"

A long moment of silence, "Yes."

"Do you hate me for being Psy?"

"No. I hate you for paying off Louis and tearing apart my den. I hate you for locking me up and making me cold on purpose. I hate you for making me talk to you and I hate you for how you are manipulating me right now. I don't know you. I don't trust you. I don't like you, yet still, I share my secrets with you. Why? Because you are a manipulative piece of shit who only cares about my answers because knowledge is your god."

Dgenero didn't respond other than to write down more copious notes. 

_Dgenero was only the first of the Cardinals to come see me. All he did was ask questions and write things down, but I have a feeling he is the one the others all reported to. He kept his own hands clean, but he was the leader of the whole group._

_How many of them were there?_

_There are...were... seven members of the Cardinals, but I only met four. Besides Dgenero, there was an M-Psy and two Telepaths. Those three would all work together to "help" me understand myself. That's what they always told me. But it was never true. They were only helping themselves better understand high powered mixed bloods and changeling shifting._

The memories started to flash in static pieces. A face, an emotion, the scent of blood or antiseptic. 

_One telepath worked on my shields for a time and then held it open for the other one. The second Telepath, Macivoy, was the worst of the three. He was like that juvenile who showed us around the den earlier. Cardinal level telepathy with mid-level empathy._ Alupis' body was shivering on the physical plane as well as in the memory. Gregori rubbed his hands over the skin of her back with one hand as the other held her impossibly closer. _You're safe. I'm here. I've got you._

_Macivoy figured out some way to force my body to shift. Then they'd cut me and he'd make me shift slowly so they could watch._

Fear and pain tinged every word and memory as Gregori caught glimpses of what was actually done to her. Yet, undercutting the fear, there was a deep reservoir of shame. _Baby, you have nothing to be ashamed of. You didn't get a say in any of this. It's not your fault and you did nothing to deserve this._

_He shifted my wolf, Gregori. The filthy Psy shifted my damn wolf and gave it more freedom than I had in my entire life._

_Hey, you don't get to beat yourself up over this. You have done the best you could with what you've been given. Do you hear me? You had no one to help you before. That's not true anymore, Alupis._

_But what if I can't do it? What if he was the only one who could get me to shift?_

"That's not true, Alupis. I know you can do it," Gregori said, "Baby, you already have."

"That was different. I wasn't trying to shift into my wolf those times, it just happened. I panicked and my wolf tore its way out to protect me. But I can't rely on terror to shift."

"You won't have to, baby. We'll find a way. I promise. The cats will help us." 


	13. Chapter 13

Alupis had never seen anything like the building she and Gregori had been taken to. The outside was impossibly tall, yet the entire thing appeared to be made of fragile glass. Oddly, no one else seemed to be worried by this fact, nor by the completely invisible nature of the doormen who worked here. A leopard changeling with long blond hair and blue eyes met them at the front desk and showed them to where they'd be meeting the DarkRiver Alpha pair.

"Mind if we take the stairs?" Gregori asked.

"The conference room is on the tenth floor," the man who had introduced himself as Dorian replied skeptically.

"My mate isn't used to skyscrapers or automatic doors and I think an elevator might be too much at once for her," Gregori explained. 

"Fine by me." 

Once in the stairwell, Gregori swooped Alupis into his arms before even the first step. "My Alupis is a princess," he said with a wink. 

By the time they reached the tenth floor, both men were out of breath. To their credit, the two very dominant men hadn't started to pick up their speed until the third floor and weren't truly racing until the fifth. When Dorian reached the top a mere three steps before Gregori, all he said was "Tenth floor." Gregori's response was to set Alupis down with a flourish and gesture grandly to the door. 

Once down the hall, Dorian opened the door to the conference room for the couple and turned to leave. The leopard alpha was seated at the other end of the long table with his mate perched on his lap. They were both smiling as they turned to greet their visitors, as if they'd snatched a moment of peace in a busy day.

Alupis stiffened slightly at the combination of cardinal eyes and the flutter of red dress the Alpha's mate wore, but her face seemed gentle and open, so Alupis continued further into the room.Sascha and Lucas stood and came around the edge of the table, Sascha's dress swishing delicately as her hips swayed. 

Her eyes, the red... it's fine.

Sascha drew her eyebrows together, confused by the fear she sensed in Alupis. Instinctively, she reached out for the fear and replaced it with calm. 

_THESE AREN'T MY EMOTIONS._

Alupis reached for the nearest chair and shoved it towards Sascha. Lucas easily deflected it before it could make contact and took up a snarling defensive stance in front of his mate. Gregori did the same as suddenly every other chair in the room hurtled towards the alpha pair. 

Alupis clung desperately to the back of Gregori's shirt as her world began to shatter. Blood. So much blood. The scent was everywhere. The Cardinal. It was an Empath. This isn't real. It isn't real.

A horrible, inhuman whine filled the air as Alupis pressed her back up against the wall. Claws sliced out of her fingertips, her wrists suddenly felt cold and constricted. _I have to get out. I have to get these off. I have to escape._

"ALUPIS!" Gregori reached for his mate's hands. She didn't know what she was doing and she was clawing at her wrists in a way that would soon lead to serious blood loss, "ALUPIS! Listen to me! It's ok! You're safe!" He grabbed her wrists just long enough to pull her arms around him and crush himself against her and the wall.

So much fear and pain... and that sound. Sascha had never heard a living creature make a sound like that before and it fucking ripped her heart out. Reaching out empathically, she tried to stem the tidal wave of fear this other woman was drowning in. Sascha felt a claw slash against her mental shields. _What?_

Meanwhile, Alupis' condition degraded even further. Her whole body was shaking and her limbs had begun partial-shifting sporadically. If it wasn't for Gregori throwing dominance behind his orders for her to breath in and out, Alupis probably would have passed out by now. 

Dorian burst through the door. The elevator door had just closed when heard the crash and snarling, otherwise he'd have gotten there sooner. "What happened?" He demanded as he moved to flank his Alpha. 

"Dorian, go get Tammy. It's Saturday, she should be in the fresh market down the street." Lucas ordered, "Sascha, can you calm her down?"

"I'm trying, but she keeps clawing me," Sascha said, reaching her arms around Lucas' frame.

" _What?"_ Lucas growled and looked murderously at Alupis. 

"Back off," Gregori growled back.

"Stop it, both of you," Sascha interceded, "I don't think it's malicious. I think she's a desperate wolf trying to protect herself. Gregori, can you get her to accept my help?"

"I can try," He replied. Telepathically and subvocally he said, " _Alupis. Listen to me. Do you trust me?"_

_Yes._

_"Then I need you to let Sascha help you. I promise, I won't let her hurt you."_

_...ok. just... don't let her put anything else into my head._

"She says she'll let you take emotions away, but you can't put any other emotions in their place."

"That might not be effective," Sascha said with a frown, "but I suppose that's better than nothing. I'll do my best, but I don't know if I can handle this much fear at once."

"Do what you can."

Sascha gathered armful after armful of Alupis' fear and pulled it into herself. The acrid terror would have overwhelmed her had she attempted this right after her defection from the PsyNet, but the years she'd spent nurturing her ability allowed her to handle it. Alupis' body became fully human again and her shaking calmed dramatically. By the time Dorian returned with the Pack's healer a few minutes later, Alupis was breathing rhythmically again.

"Her arms are cut," Gregori said as Tammy rushed in with the first aid kit. Alupis stayed pressed against him, but she unwrapped one arm at a time so the healer could work on her shredded wrists.

"Is she hurt anywhere else?" Tammy asked as she finished, "I scent a lot of blood. What happened?"

"She had a nose bleed. She is not hurt anywhere else. Thank you," Gregori said. He accepted a wet cloth from Tammy and took a half step back so he could clean the blood off Alupis' face. His mate's clothes were in tatters from all the partial shifting she'd done earlier and the parts that remained had drips of blood on them. 

"Does your mate have something to change into?" Gregori asked Lucas.

"There's a stash of extra clothing in the locker room downstairs," Lucas said, "It'll all smell like cat, but I'm sure something there will fit her."

"No, not for my mate, for your mate. Alupis does not like red. I think it will be better if she changes into a different color. I have another dress for Alupis in my bag," Gregori reached into his brown satchel and pulled out a swath of fabric, "Where is the nearest bathroom?"

Dorian showed them to the family bathroom down the hall. There, Gregori used warm water and a paper towel to get the rest of the blood off Alupis. He threw the remains of this morning's outfit in the trash and held her skin to skin for a bit. The terror might be over, but he could feel how fragile his mate still was. 

"You are fine," Gregori comforted, "Everyone is fine. You faced your demons and have come out on the other side. You won. There is nothing to be ashamed about or worry about. From what I've seen, I don't think Sascha will hold any of it against you. I'm sure the leopards will forget all about it... eventually."

↞ ※ ↠

"I can't get it out of my head. That poor girl," Sascha leaned her head against Lucas' strong chest as he held her. The scene in the conference room had rattled her. 

Lucas didn't say anything, but continued rubbing her back in long, slow strokes.

"We have to help her, Lucas."

"We will, kitten. How are your shields?"

"I repaired the damage as soon as she stopped... as soon as she was feeling better. It really wasn't her fault, Lucas."

"I'm not thrilled she clawed you, but I see your point. Hell, she couldn't even control her shifting, it makes sense that her mind went into defense mode too." On her back, Lucas' hand slowed its rhythm. 

"Sascha," Lucas said with that one nameless tone she instantly recognized.

"We are going to help that woman, Lucas."

"Yes, kitten. If she can be helped, we will help her. But I don't want you in the same room as her until we figure out exactly what just happened."

Sascha frowned, but nodded to Lucas' reason. She had just been telepathically attacked by a Cardinal of unknown abilities who had been set off by unknown triggers within seconds of meeting her. It struck her anew how, while her empathic abilities helped her to see what others couldn't, they could also blind her at the same time. Lucas hadn't felt the depths of sadness and utter hopelessness that had poured off of Alupis. Lucas hadn't been blinded by how hurt Alupis was and by how much Alupis might need Sascha right now. 

Now that the event was over, she pieced through the remaining emotions that were still being resolved inside of her. The pain, the fear, those were only the most obvious of Alupis' emotions. There had simply been so much of those two that she hadn't picked up on the feelings that hit far closer to home. Alupis felt she was deeply, inherently, flawed. 

"Her body was COVERED in scars, Lucas," Sascha said quietly, "Covered. And her insides... she feels like she's broken. She thinks she's flawed."

Lucas held her a little closer, he knew how painful this subject could be for his mate, even after all these years of realizing how vibrant her ability could be. He would never forgive those bastards who'd called her a defective cardinal and made her feel like she was broken and lesser. Nothing was further from the truth when it came to his incredible Sascha, but his leopard warned him that the same might hold true for Alupis as well. Just because this other woman felt broken didn't mean she couldn't eventually pose a threat to his mate and cub. Until he understood exactly what was going on with this wolf, he wouldn't be letting her anywhere near them. 

↞ ※ ↠

"Where is Sascha?" Gregori asked as he escorted the newly cleaned and calmedAlupis into a new conference room. Lucas was leaning against the table where Dorian and Tammy, the healer, were seated. 

"I thought it best we continue this meeting without her present," Lucas replied. The way Alupis' shoulders relaxed was not lost on him. What the hell did this wolf have against his perfect Sascha?

"So," Lucas continued, "You came all the way from Russia to let me know that there's another Psy-Changeling in the world, correct?"

"Yes."

Lucas nodded, but his bright green eyes had taken on a slightly different quality as he studied Alupis. "How is it, then, that I've never heard any rumors about her? She looks like she's certainly been alive for a while now and there's no way she could have been hiding so close to Moscow without being discovered," Lucas' piercing eyes shifted to Gregori, "Why don't you cut the crap and tell me where she actually came from?"

Gregori bristled slightly. Did _Lucas Hunter_ just call his mate _old_? "We _are_ from Russia. I have been a lieutenant in BlackEdge for several years now and Alupis is a member as well. She came to me several months ago and has been a Russian ever since. Before that, she lived in a country that no longer exists."

"What country?"

"It doesn't matter." Gregori said with his arms crossed. 

"I say it does."

"Gregori," Alupis said gently, "Opus et auxilium. Byt' khoroshim."

Gregori looked to his mate and sighed, "The reason you have never heard of my Alupis before is because she came here from 600 years ago. Her psychic ability allows her to teleport to the future. My mate is only old in terms of time. Her body is still young."

The room quieted for a bit as they took in what he'd said. 

"So, you're saying that she's 600 years old?" Tammy asked. 

"No. She was born much earlier. She only just came from 600 years ago," Gregori replied. 

Lucas sat pensively, "Sascha, what do you think? Have you ever heard of this kind of ability?"

Alupis' head tilted in a very canine fashion. 

"Wow... well, I can't say as I've ever heard of an ability quite like that," Sascha's voice came from the darkened communications panel on the wall. "However, it might be some variation on telekinesis if she's doing it via teleport. I can call and ask Judd."

Alupis had jumped a bit when she heard Sascha's voice and was now looking around confusedly for the Empath.

"It's a comm call," Gregori explained to Alupis, "Sascha is in a different room and calling us on that black panel."

Alupis stared intently at the wall in question, "Why is she on other side of wall?"

Gregori answered her question while looking pointedly at Lucas, "So she can still be in this meeting without her mate having to worry about her."

"She does not sound like she is on other side of wall," Alupis said mostly to herself, still confused but willing to accept Gregori's answer. 

"I think she's a Tk as well, Sascha, especially after what happened with the chairs earlier," Lucas said. 

"What happened with the chairs?" Dorian asked, intrigued.

"She threw them all at Sascha," Lucas replied, now it was his turn to cross his arms.

"At Sascha darling?" Dorian clutched his hand to his heart in mock hurt, "Why?"

"Ask her," Lucas huffed and gestured towards Alupis.

All eyes suddenly turned to the wolf in the corner. Gregori's grip around her shoulders instinctively tightened, supporting her. Though in human form, Alupis looked every inch like a sad dog who'd been caught doing something wrong and regretted it. Lucas' panther calmed a bit at the sight and his face gentled slightly. 

"I am sorry," Alupis said, "I only meant to throw one chair."

Tammy, already the closest to Alupis and Gregori, put a comforting hand on Alupis' arm. It hurt Tammy to see others in pain, always had. Very gently, Tammy asked, "Why did you throw the first chair?"

"I was scared," Alupis' answer was directed only at Tammy, but everyone else was listening intently. 

"Why, Sweetie?" Tammy prodded, "Why were you scared?"

"Because Sascha..." Alupis started, but couldn't finish whatever it was she was about to say. Instead, she took a deep breath and composed herself. When she looked up again, only the dark night sky of her watery eyes revealed any pain. The rest of Alupis' tanned features united to form a brave face, boldly standing against the accusatory stare of a leopard Alpha. "I have bad memories of other Cardinals. I know what an E can do and I know better than to think they are all good."

Sascha knew. They all knew. Between training the newly awakened Empaths to what Sascha herself had been able to do when Naya had almost been taken, they all knew how powerful and dangerous Es could be. After all, it was Sascha who first warned them all that not all Es were inherently good. But there's just something about hearing someone else say it, especially when that someone had as many visible scars as Alupis. Could an Empath really torture someone? Yes, there was a rebound effect whenever an Empath tried to hurt someone but... were there ways around that? Sascha suffered no ill effects from sending out a wave of terror to protect Naya. Maybe Es in the past were able to find another way to short-circuit the rebound effect. 

Sascha felt a wave of love and trust stroke over the mating bond. Of course Lucas had been able to guess her thoughts. 

"Yes," Lucas began, "we've managed to piece that together. Empaths, like all other designations, are individuals. Some will always be nicer than others and each one must be taken on their own. I can assure you, Alupis, my Sascha is one of the good ones."

Alupis nodded. She might not trust Sascha yet, but that wasn't a battle to be fought right now.

"So, what is it that you've come all this way for?" Lucas continued, "Moscow is a long flight and while I'm definitely interested in the existence of another Psy-Changeling, I could have easily met her over a comm call. Tell me, what did you need to ask for in person?"

Gregori took a deep breath before answering; this meeting had not been going well so far and for the first time, he questioned whether the leopards would even be willing to help them. "Alupis has difficulty shifting. I have felt how painful it is for her and there are rumors that members of your pack might be able to help. I know we have given you reasons not to like us or trust us and I am sorry about what happened earlier. I realize you might not be inclined to offer us anything, but I only ask for the sake of my mate. Will you help us?"

Dorian and Lucas made momentary eye contact, silently making sure the other was ok with them offering the other's help.

"Absolutely," Lucas said, "Dorian here is the one to ask about shifting. If anyone can help Alupis, it'll be him."

"I was born latent," Dorian explained, "It wasn't until I found my scientist of a mate that I was able to shift for the first time. But there's another changeling I know who was born able to shift, but who later couldn't because of a traumatic event when she was little. If you don't mind my asking, is this shifting problem something you were born with or is it something that started after something bad happened?"

Gregori looked at Alupis. From their faces and lack of throat movements, it was obvious they were communicating telepathically. Lucas couldn't help but envy the fact that Gregori could talk to his Psy like that. He'd never been able to do so with Sascha. Maybe it was because Alupis was part changeling? Would his daughter Naya ever be able to talk with him like that?

"Alupis was born able to shift," Gregori said, turning back to the group, "but doing so has always been extremely painful for her. She says that it's the pain that keeps her from pushing through into a full shift." Gregori took a sip of water from a glass on the table, "But recently, her shifting has changed. The Psy... they did experiments on her. Now her shifting is more complete, but more painful and less controlled."

Around the table, every single jaw was clenched. DarkRiver was a pack that knew far too much about Psy who liked to experiment on changeling females. Dorian's younger sister, Kylie, had been kidnapped, tortured, and murdered by a Psy serial killer named Enrique Santano. It had only been a few years ago that they'd caught the bastard and dished out the brutal justice he deserved, but the memories were still vivid. 

"Who." Dorian ground out the question as best he could. 

"Trust me, if they were still alive, I would've killed them myself," Gregori said. 

"They? Plural?"

"They were a group of Cardinal Psy who were powerful in the Middle Ages," Gregori explained bitterly, "But they're all long dead now."

"Alupis," Dorian said, his voice having softened by a good ten degrees, "I promise, I will do everything I can to help you free your wolf."

Alupis' eyes watered for what seemed like the fifth time in an hour. 

"Thank you."


	14. Chapter 14

After some discussion, it was decided that the best place to teach Alupis how to shift would be an open area right near the SnowDancer-DarkRiver border. The very next morning, Judd and Lara drove the wolf couple down to meet with the special team Dorian had assembled. 

"Good Morning," Dorian smiled and turned to introduce the other members of his pack, "This is my beautiful, sexy, brilliant mate, Ashaya. She's the scientist I was telling you helped me figure out my shifting," Dorian gave a wink before continuing on to the others, "And this is Kirby. She's the Lynx who learned how to shift later in life. Her mate, Bastien, tagged along because she's pregnant and he's overprotective. You already know our healer, Tammy, of course," he made a conspiratorial face, leaned in and mock whispered, "have I mentioned Bas is a little overprotective?"

"Just you wait, Blondie," Bas replied, "It might just happen to you too some day."

"Maybe," he said with a quick kiss to Ashaya, "but in the meantime, I'm having too much fun mocking you. Seriously, man, she's barely a month pregnant. You gotta save some for the other eight months."

"Really, though, I don't mind," Tammy interjected, "It's nice to see you again."

Alupis nodded. Already, her stomach was in knots. She had intentionally not eaten anything since the night before and her empty stomach was churning with acid. Gregori and the rest of them might be well intentioned, but she was not going to enjoy this. 

"Can we begin?" Alupis asked. The sooner they started the sooner it'd be over. 

"Of course," Dorian replied, "I was thinking we could start by watching what you've got so far and then going from there."

"You will not give me advice first?" Alupis asked incredulously. Or at least as incredulously as someone speaking a new language can. Her mouth was not used to forming these words, much less adding nuanced inflections.

"Oh, yeah, we could do that," Dorian grinned sheepishly and ran a hand through his shaggy blond hair, "I've only sort of done this once before. If that's what you think will help the most, we can start there."

Alupis tried to keep the horror off her face as she looked at Gregori. These were the miracle changeling gurus who were going to solve her shifting problems?

"Anything you can give us is better than what we have now," Gregori said gratefully, "You are the only people we know who could possibly help us. Even if this does not work, I want you all to know how grateful I am."

"Of course," Kirby said before anyone else could, "we'll do everything we can."

Dorian nodded, "I agree. Before we begin, the best advice I have is that you need to allow your animal to come to the forefront of your mind and push through. Embrace your wolf and don't be afraid to let it take control. It will feel strange, but don't fight it."

Alupis nodded and turned expectantly towards Kirby.

"I haven't been doing this as long as Dorian," Kirby said shyly, "but what helped me the most was when Bas shifted with me. His dominance helped get my lynx to follow his leopard into the shift. Maybe you and Gregori can try that?"

"I can be less dominant than Gregori," Alupis nodded. 

"I'm willing to try it," Gregori added as he pulled off his shirt.

Alupis took a deep, steadying breath, "Is this all of your advice?"

Dorian and Kirby looked at each other. 

"I know it doesn't seem like much," Dorian reasoned, "but it might just be enough to get you through."

Alupis heaved one long sigh to the sky before she disrobed for her shift. Deep breath. Wheeew. Deeeeep breaths. 

Gregori's hand wrapped around the back of her neck and squeezed gently, his thumb slowly stroking her racing pulse. 

_You are my special flower. All you need to do is follow after me, my princess. Come after me and I will catch you on the other side._

Alupis closed her eyes and leaned her forehead into Gregori's. She could do this. Wolf comes to the front. Wolf takes over the mind, then follows Gregori's wolf through the rest. 

_Ready?_

_Ready._

Several things happened all at once. First, Gregori shifted flawlessly into a large grey wolf. Second, Alupis gave full control of her brain to her animal. Third, everything went to hell. 

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH HER!!!" Gregori snarled before he remembered he was still in wolf form and the leopards couldn't understand him. A shower of sparks and he was back to yelling at them with his human tongue, "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY MATE???"

Something was very clearly _wrong_ with Alupis. Her wolf brown eyes stared wildly about. She stood on all fours, whipping her head back and forth until her eyes landed on her paws. But they weren't her paws... they were her hands. Her arms... they were her regular, human arms. Literally everything about her body had stayed the same, except for the fact that she was acting crazy. 

Human fingernails clawed at the ground as she bared her human teeth and growled a very unimpressive grrrrrrrrrrr. Slowly, with none of the natural born grace of a changeling, she wobble-crawled backwards. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

"What the fuck?" Bas said and turned to the rest of the group, "Was that supposed to happen?"

"No?" Dorian said, "How did this even happen? WHAT is even happening?"

"YOU!" Gregori pointed and bellowed, "You did this! You told her to let her wolf take her mind!"

"This is OBVIOUSLY not what I meant!" Dorian objected, "Wait, is that what's happening?"

"YES, IDIOT! You told her to let the wolf take over and now it is only her wolf in her brain. I can't feel her Psy through the bond at all. She feels wild and feral and I can't get her to talk to me."

Dorian gave a very concerned look to Tammy and the wolf healer, Lara, "Is it possible for someone not in wolf form to go rogue?"

Gregori's fist slugged his face before Dorian even knew what was happening, "Don't you even say that! No. No she is not rogue and no you will not be bringing your hunter in to put down my mate. She's NOT. And even if she were, it would be your damn fault cat!"

"Whoa, baby, it's okay," Tammy crooned gently. Both men stopped cold and gaped at her. "Shhhh, it's okay, Alupis. You're okay," she said in the voice one uses to soothe a wild animal or convince it not to run away. 

Very softly she added, "Boys, this is not the time to be yelling and angry. She's not herself right now and you're scaring her away."

A quick glance confirmed that Alupis was now 20 feet further away than she used to be. Judd had noticed and quietly begun to flank her while staying out of her line of sight. 

"Whether she's rogue or not, we need to make sure she's with us.This isn't a good time for her to be roaming the woods alone," Tammy advised. 

Nodding, but still angry, the two dominant men silently agreed to put aside who was at fault until they'd fixed this. 

"We need to keep her here," Gregori said, after a long pause, adding, "I do not think she will stay of her own will. There is no pull from inside her telling her to stay."

Everyone's face tightened in a collective _oh shit_. Gregori might not have put it in so many words, but if her wolf wasn't being drawn by the mating bond between them, that was seriously bad news. 

"We need to help Judd contain her; make sure she doesn't run away," Dorian offered, "Between the three of us, I think we can make a triangle trap. Bas, stay with the women a little bit away and keep them safe. We don't know what to expect."

"I will keep her attention on me and come from the front," Gregori added, "You two will sneak around the back. Try to stay hidden, but if she sees you or starts to run, chase her back towards me."

Still in human form, Dorian melted into the backdrop of his home territory to join Judd and share the plan.

Gregori kept his attention on his mate, but waited until he thought the others were likely in position. Throughout the whole time, he never stopped petting her through the bond. _I love you. Remember me. You're safe._ If only she would accept it. 

"Alupis?" Gregori switched to Russian, hoping it would comfort her, "Is that my princess? Why are you so far away? Come closer." Slowly, he inched forward, "Why don't you come over here and I can pet you?" Another cautious step forward, "Huh, beautiful? What do you say? Want to come closer? I can hold you?"

Alupis had stilled at his attention, but looked _highly_ suspicious of his movements toward her. She sniffed the air and gave him a haughty look as she leaned away from him. 

"No, don't be like that,"Gregori paused his forward movement. Instead, he flopped over on his side, hoping to inspire the playful side of her wolf, "See? I'm here for fun. I won't hurt you. Come back to me."

She took two small steps backward and let out a whiny, "Aaaooohwooooo."

"Your head hurts, babe?" Gregori cooed and leaned up on his elbows, "Come over here, let me rub your temples."

Alupis made puppy-dog eyes at Gregori as she brought her head down and whined. 

"Ok, then let me come to you," Gregori moved slowly on all fours toward his mate, trying to look as small and un-intimidating as possible. This was easier said than done since Gregori's human form was about as proportionally large as his wolf form and covered in muscles and tattoos. Still, he managed to get within five feet of her before Alupis suddenly stiffened.

Her back arched and her teeth bared as she shuffled hastily backwards. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr. She looked around, but couldn't seem to pinpoint whatever it was she was looking for. Her breathing became irregular and she lunged sideways, trying to make a break for the woods. Alupis' movements were remarkably unsteady as she made her escape attempt. Even if Dorian hadn't jumped down in front of her, Gregori was shocked to realize how easily he could have caught her. It was almost like she was drunk. 

On the inside, Alupis still couldn't figure out what was happening. Her world was spinning and there were so many strange smells and nothing felt right. There was a cat in front of her and then there wasn't and somehow she'd ended up pinned to the ground. Why was all of this happening? Where was Gregori? When had it become so dark?

Gregori ran back to grab his shirt and jacket while Dorian kept Alupis in place. Judd had offered to use his Tk to keep her safely in place, but Alupis had only struggled more desperately to get out of his grasp. It was clear she needed to be at least somewhat bound, but he would do everything in his power to keep it from triggering any memories of her imprisonment. With a little bit of teamwork, the three of them were able to button her into his shirt backwards and tie the sleeves around her. 

She was smaller than him, in this form at least, and his shirt covered enough of her to almost be modest. He stroked her side through the thin cotton material, just as he had those few short months ago when he'd first found her and they were still confined to the den infirmary. Alupis stopped struggling now that he was the one on top of her instead of Dorian. Seeing that she had calmed down a bit, Gregori shifted more of his weight to his elbows so he wasn't crushing her. 

"Will you stay here with me now, Princess?" Gregori said lovingly, kissing her head. The hand he'd been petting her with moved to gently brush the hair away from her face and stroke her cheek. He looked down into her eyes. They were hugely dilated and unblinking. 

"Lara?" Gregori called loudly, not realizing the SnowDancer healer had already made her way over to check on Alupis. 

"Right here."

"Oh, sorry," Gregori apologized in a more normal tone, "Would you check her eyes? I think something might be wrong with them. She's not blinking."

Lara reached for the small pen light she kept in her pocket and shone the light into Alupis' eyes. Lara pursed her lips and adjusted the light.

"Can you keep her head still?" Lara asked, "I need to check something in the very back of her eye, but it'll be impossible to see if she's moving."

Gregori shifted so that both of his huge hands were holding Alupis' head in place. Through the bond, he ordered her to keep her eyes focused on one spot, that it was important that she not move her eyes for a little bit. Not that his orders had been working at all the last few minutes, but still, it might be worth something. 

"It's difficult to tell for sure with just this weak beam, but it looks like her optic nerve is swollen," Lara frowned, "That's why her eyes aren't reacting to the light as they should. I need to scan her head for any bleeding or other injury that would be causing intracranial pressure. I can't have your hands in the way of the scanner, but I also need her immobilized."

Gregori shifted one hand under her chin and pressed three fingers to the top of her head, keeping the rest of his arm angled away. 

"We need to get her to an infirmary immediately," Lara concluded after only a few seconds looking at the scanner, "Her brain is under a tremendous amount of pressure and if we don't find a way to relieve some of it soon, the damage will be irreversible. DarkRiver's infirmary is closest, but it's really not the place I want to be doing major brain surgery. I can't tell what's causing it because there's no bleeding and no buildup of fluid, so the only way I can think of to lessen the pressure is to cut into her skull. Still, a major hospital would be better. Judd, do you have a teleport lock on any hospitals nearby?"

"Of course," Judd replied.

"No," Gregori said, "Not to hospital."

"No, Gregori, she needs a hospital or she'll..."

"Nyet," Gregori cut off the healer before she could finish, "No, she must go to Sascha. Sashca is the only one who might be able to help."

Everyone looked dumbfounded. Sascha? What could Sascha do to help?

"You said it yourself," Gregori began to explain, "You do not see anything that could be causing this pressure, but I know what is causing it. She did not shift her skull when she shifted and her wolf's brain cannot fit in her human head. I can't tell how much of her brain changed in the shift or whether it has fully shifted or partial shifted, but whatever the case is, that is the cause of her inter-crayon... the cause of her brain pressure. A doctor cannot force her to shift back, so a doctor cannot help her."

"And Sascha can?" Tammy retorted.

"When she was taken, an E was able to force her to shift. If Sascha can do the same, she can save my Alupis. I hate it, but it is the only thing I have that might save her. Please."

Dorian and Tammy exchanged glances.

"Sascha is the best," Dorian began, "but the E's have only been active for a few years now. Even if this is something E's used to be able to do, it's no longer common knowledge. She won't know how to do what you're asking."

"I know what they did," Gregori felt bile move to his throat as he continued, "I can coach her."

Dorian called his Alpha and a few minutes later, Judd teleported Lucas Hunter into the clearing, followed by Sascha approximately ten seconds later. 

"What exactly are you asking Sascha to do?" Lucas asked, having already been debriefed by Dorian.

"I need her to shift Alupis back to how she was," Gregori said.

"That's impossible," Lucas retorted, "no one can control another person's shift."

"It's been done before," Gregori replied, "to my Alupis."

"How?" Sascha asked gently, "What do you need me to do? I want to help, but I have no idea what I can do for her. I was told you thought you could coach me through it?"

Gregori closed his eyes and sighed. Part of him was relieved that she'd agreed to help, but there was no part of this situation that was good. "I need you to overwhelm her with emotion. I know the other Psy used intense fear to control her shifts, but I don't know if he used the same emotion for both directions of the shift or just the one way. I'd like you to try overwhelming her with relief. I think if fear can make her wolf come out to protect her, relief can make the wolf go home."

"I can try that," Sascha agreed and took a seat next to Alupis. In her heart and mind, she reached for traces of that emotion in herself. She thought of the countless moments of terror and relief she felt daily now that her daughter, Naya, had taken to jumping off of any high perch she could find. She thought back to the time her precious little cub had almost been kidnapped and the relief she'd felt when it was all over and Lucas held them both tightly back at the aerie. She'd felt so safe. Pulling the deep threads of these memories, she poured them into Alupis. Alupis was safe. Yes, she'd tried something meant for big changelings, but she was safe now. It was going to be ok. Anyone who wanted to hurt her was gone now and her mate would hold her safe and sound forever, she would be protected in his arms. 

Wave after wave of the most blissful peace washed over Alupis' battered mind. She'd been holding on for so long, always on the lookout for trouble or pain, always staying just a little bit off to the side. These emotions, they spoke of such love, such connectedness, they couldn't possibly be hers. Tears came unbidden to Alupis' eyes. Would she ever experience these things without some damn Psy?

PSY! Shit. A mental connection clicked into place. Suddenly, clothing and flesh tore apart as the rest of her wolf finally decided to join the party. " _YOU DON'T FUCKING CONTROL ME, PSY!"_ she growled and lunged forward, snapping her teeth in search of her torturer's throat. If it weren't for the restraints (every damn time), she'd have done some serious damage. 

The strap around her muzzle grew painfully tight as a heavy weight was thrown on her back. Still, she fought them, as she always fought them. She was an alpha wolf changeling and they better damn appreciate that she would never lie down and let them experiment on her without a fight. 

In half a heartbeat, Lucas had grabbed Sascha and flung her safely behind him as he transformed into his jet black leopard. Gregori was holding her mouth closed for now, but that was one big ass wolf and Lucas wasn't taking any chances. He snarled as the other members of his pack shifted as well. 

Alupis turned towards the noise and locked eyes with Lucas. Her gaze held all of the haughty dominance of an alpha and she showed no signs of backing down. Leave it to Alupis to pick yet another fight with yet another important alpha. Surely, this could only end in blood. Except, somehow, it didn't. 

Lucas thought it was like watching someone wake up from hypnosis. One minute, she was a snarling, pissed off alpha, and the next she wasn't any of those things. How the fuck do you change your fucking dominance? He watched as Alupis sniffed the air a bit, looked around, looked highly confused, and then seemed to accept it all and simply sat down as if she hadn't just almost fucking ripped Sascha's throat out. God, he wanted to kill her. It took everything in him not to act. It was pure instinct to kill anyone who tried to kill his Sascha. 

_What happened?_ Alupis asked Gregori telepathically.

_You tried to shift and then you almost died and then you almost killed Sascha and then I almost died because Lucas was almost going to kill you and I couldn't let that happen and then, thankfully, we all came to our senses,_ Gregori explained, _Alupis, please promise you won't try to kill Sascha again. I think Lucas might actually kill you next time and I'm not prepared for that._

"You can't see Sascha ever again," Lucas growled once he'd shifted back to human form, "You will never be in the same room as her and you are not allowed to interact with her at all, ever, unless it is over long distance and someone is guarding her. Are we clear?"

_I wasn't trying to kill Sascha,_ Alupis said in a telepathic whisper. 

"Yes," Gregori answered, "I understand. Your Sascha is not safe yet with my Alupis. Some day, maybe, but not now. Not until she is more healed."

_Tell him,_ Alupis laid down and rested her head on her paws, _I want them to know I didn't mean to hurt Sascha._

"Alupis says she never meant to hurt Sascha and she didn't know what she was doing," Gregori translated her thoughts for the others, "It was my fault. I should have known not to try this. It was too close to her memories and my decision triggered her relapse. Please, Sascha, will you forgive me?"

"I can't," Sascha shook her head, "I can't forgive you for something that was not your fault. You were trying to save her life, we both were. Her reaction was not your fault and not my fault either. It was no one's fault except for the people who originally hurt her. I want you to know I hold no hard feelings. I was not hurt, no one else was hurt, and Alupis is no longer dying or trapped in a partial shift. I'd say it was a close-success." 

_Pet me,_ Alupis looked up with big, sorrowful eyes at Sascha.

"You can talk to me?" Sascha asked aloud in wonder. 

_Pet me?_ was her only response. 

"It's ok, Lucas. She's in her right mind," Sascha said as she took his hand and walked closer to Alupis. She had every intention of petting this big, sad puppy, but she also wasn't going to drive her mate insane with worry, "She won't hurt me."

"No, she won't," Gregori agreed, "Alupis has promised me not to hurt Sascha."

"As long as she actually recognizes it's Sascha," Lucas added with a barely contained snip. 

Gregori nodded, it really went without saying after the events of the last two days. 

Sascha's hand cautiously reached down and stroked between Alupis' ears. Alupis' tail began a soft thumping on the ground and she scooted closer. Sascha ran her fingers through the wolf's thick fur, a little more sure of herself now that Alupis seemed more friendly towards her. Sascha had never had a dog growing up, but Tammy's cat seemed to like having its chin rubbed, so she tried that. 

Relief; not from a Psy or any outside source, but from within herself. Alupis knew she'd been forgiven something that was not forgivable. She might not have been in her right mind, but she had attacked an alpha's mate and then challenged him for dominance in his home territory. She deserved a death sentence, yet they let her live. Now, the alpha's mate was petting her and she had never felt so accepted by anyone other than Gregori. Her wolf let go of its hold on her and her body shifted painfully back into human form. 

"Thank you," Alupis mumbled as she reached up to hug Sascha. Amazingly, this woman she had tried to kill just minutes before held her back. Maybe this time things were going to be ok. 


	15. Chapter 15

Alupis was exhausted. She'd managed to hang on for as long as they'd been with the leopards, but now that they were back in their room, she happily collapsed on the bed. Between the physical pain of shifting and the emotional turmoil every flashback brought with it, she had used up all of her reserve energy. 

Gregori was only slightly less tired than Alupis. After she'd shifted back, he realized how depleted she was and had spent the trip back pouring his own energy into her. All this translated into two full days where the pair did not wake up for anything other than food and bathroom breaks. 

When the haze of exhaustion finally lifted, Gregori knew he couldn't put off the conversation any longer. 

"LuLu," Gregori brushed the hair off her face when she rolled to face him,"I'm sorry about what happened."

"I forgive you," Alupis pet his chest in return, "It was not your fault. I am sorry... that you did not get what you want."

"No, baby," Gregori's arms encompassed Alupis and dragged her flush against himself, "I only want you. I don't need a mate who can shift, I want you. I want you even if you never get even a little bit better at shifting. You're what I want."

Alupis clung to Gregori and his words. They would have to be enough. "I do not want to shift for a time."

Gregori's entire torso relaxed, "I agree. I was going to suggest it too, but didn't know how."

They held each other for a while longer. 

"Alupis," Gregori said with a last hint of sleepiness, "Staying in this form does not make you any less of a wolf. You should know that."

"I do," Alupis mumbled.

"And being Psy is not anything to be ashamed of. I love every part of you."

"I love you too."

Gregori kissed her forehead and settled in for one more lazy hour. The world could wait a bit longer. 

↞ ※ ↠

Ever since they'd emerged from their quarters, Alupis had been nagged by two complementary needs. This first was to make herself a new bow and gather other weapons. Her claws might be semi-permanently sheathed, but she still had the combat and weapons training of the last few centuries to work with. If she was going to spend the next however-long in this form, she'd need to convince her wolf that she could take care of things herself. She couldn't do that unless she became armed to the teeth at all times. Even though Gregori was always around to protect her, she missed the comforting weight of a bow across her shoulders and a quiver at her side. Just the thought made her homesick. 

Unlike the first, the second was a need, but not necessarily a want. Leave it to Gregori to tell her to do something without actually telling her. He was right. She needed to stop being so ashamed of her Psy. She had to stop telling herself 'you're not like them'. Just because it's true doesn't mean it does any good to repeat it. She was not like the Psy of the past, but then again, these Psy might not be like them either. Maybe going through whatever this silence thing was changed what it meant to be Psy. Maybe time really could change anything.

 

↞ ※ ↠

Marlee Lauren had been in the middle of playing a game of hide and seek with Ben and some of the other children when she heard a soft telepathic knock. Of course, this was nothing new to her, she and the rest of the Lauren family communicated telepathically all the time. What _was_ odd was the fact that she didn't recognize the "feel" of the mind who was knocking. Ever since their defection from the PsyNet, Judd, Walker, Sienna, Toby, and Marlee had been in a Psy Network all of their own called the LaurenNet. Sure, Brenna, Lara, and even Hawke were in there too now that they'd become mated to Judd, Walker, and Sienna, but they couldn't telepath like the rest of the Laurens.

_Hello? Who is it?_ Marlee asked curiously.

_I am Alupis Vanin, mate of Gregori Vanin and member of BlackEdge. I request permission to visit._

_I'm hiding, but sure!We're playing hide and seek. Come join us!_

The young Psy's mind felt friendly enough. Alupis had always believed in doing the more unpleasant tasks first to get them out of the way. That's why she'd reached out to this child even though she probably should've asked one of the adults. Regardless, this juvenile had welcomed and even invited her. Surely this friendly little one was part of a large group. Alupis would only stay on the edge of it anyway, she only needed access to find a Psy teacher, it wasn't like she was going to attack anyone.

Alupis slipped inside the bubble of this new Net and saw about eight minds in the half second before an impenetrable shield snapped tight around her mind. Alupis let out a long string of ancient expletives. Not this again. Surely she couldn't still be this stupid as to not think about psychic traps becoming more advanced over time. She should've been more careful about this. Come to think of it, she should also probably stop swearing just in case this shield wasn't soundproofed. That young girl was probably still nearby and should definitely not be learning those words. 

Judd Lauren had slammed ten layers of shields around the intruder before his conscious mind even realized what had happened. His years as an Arrow had given him incredible reflexes and extensive training in telepathic combat. 

_Uncle Judd?_

_Marlee?_

_Uncle Judd, that's Alupis._

Judd knew the name instantly; her actions the other day were hard to forget. He'd seen how little control this Psy-Changeling had over her Changeling form, so it stood to reason that her Psy half might be equally volatile. He dropped only some of the shields around her mind and modified the rest to allow for communication. 

_How did you enter the LaurenNet?_

Alupis felt calmer now that she'd been let out of the cage. She could now hear and see the other member of the Net she'd joined, but somehow it still felt like she didn't have full access. Her mind lightly touched the space in front of her and met resistance. Clear shields. This was new. _I was invited,_ she explained. 

Judd took a moment to process this. Severing his bond to the PsyNet and forming the LaurenNet had been a terrifying and painful experience. It was not something he'd done lightly. All Psy needed the biofeedback the Net provides and instinctively link into it at birth. Most Psy would never dream of severing that link, nor even knew that the PsyNet was not the only Network that existed. _Why would you do this?_

_I came to visit and to find a teacher,_ Alupis replied.

_Visit?_

_Yes. It is word that means stay for short time._

_I know what visit means,_ Judd responded coolly, _But why would you join my family's net for such a thing?_

_Is this no longer how Psy prefer to communicate? I was trying to be polite._

Judd took another minute to process this. Alupis was an unknown and there were many things he realized he could not assume when dealing with her. 

_Was this wrong? I can leave if you want me to._

_No. Not yet at least. Is joining and leaving Nets easy or painful for you?_

_The process is easy, but sometimes the results are painful._

_Please elaborate._

_...Elaborate?_

_Explain._

_It is easy to join, but you might not like what you find there if you do not have permission. Traps. Other things like traps. That is why I knocked._

_I see. So would it be easy for you to leave the LaurenNet?_

Alupis tested to see if the invisible shield would allow her to leave. _Turn your bubble into wall and I can leave from edge of Net._

Judd did as she asked and within a second she was gone. 

_Marlee, do you know where Alupis is?_

_No. I'm sorry, Uncle Judd._

_Where are you?_

_I'm in the white zone playing hide and seek with the other kids._

Judd's mind had always thought strategically, which was a large part of why he was still alive after all his years on the Arrow squad. There were only two reasons why Alupis would single out Marlee as an entry point to the LaurenNet. Either she was intentionally exploiting the weaknesses of a child, or her telepathic abilities were limited to a certain physical range. While he didn't know much about this strange wolf-Psy, he'd lived in a changeling pack long enough to know what a high value most changelings placed on children. With that thought in mind, he headed in the direction of the white zone to play some hide and seek of his own.

↞ ※ ↠

Alupis had never gotten used to the inevitable social awkwardness that accompanied her time traveling. It almost didn't matter when she tried to be polite; she still ended up constantly offending people. Nevertheless, she had taken an important first step in making contact with the Psy family who lived with the pack and, therefore, deserved to reward herself with making a bow.

Most of the trees in this area were pine or other softwoods, so finding the right hardwood stick was going to be a challenge. Still, it was a good excuse to go for a long walk outside. That was what she'd missed most during her confinement; simply being outdoors. As a child, she'd spent most of her time roaming the plains or the forests. Even now that she was grown, she still felt more at home under the sky than under any roof. She breathed in deep the scent of open woodlands, letting it reach into and refresh her very soul. Gregori hadn't been able to accompany her because of something about a hawk, but she didn't mind being alone in the forest. 

On the heals of that thought, she realized that wasn't exactly true. She did not mind being alone in the forest, but right now she was not actually alone. There was something off in the air, no... it was the feel of a certain part of the forest that was bothering her. The timing was off, somehow. 

Judd had found Alupis' trail fairly quickly once he'd gotten past the white zone and the swarm of children who always clung to him. He didn't mind. In fact, he loved playing with the little ones and indulging them when they asked him to make them "fly" using his Tk. Still, it had caused enough of a delay that Alupis had traveled a fair distance before he found her. 

More for his own curiosity than for anything else, Judd decided to test his theory on what this Psy's sub-designation might be. Using the trick he'd stumbled across in his Arrow training, he shifted the individual cells of his body just slightly out of sync. Based on past experiences, this made it so that even a changeling's keen senses couldn't see, hear, or smell him from any distance. Obviously, this made it all the more interesting when Alupis immediately turned and stared straight at him. 

"What are you doing?" Alupis asked with her head cocked to the side. 

"Testing a theory," Judd replied.

"About what?" Alupis remarked, "The most strange way a person can dance in the woods?"

"Dancing? I'm not dancing. I'm blurring my cells so I can disappear. What does it look like to you?" Judd asked in a thoroughly serious tone. 

"I do slower, but it looks like this," Alupis began to gyrate every part of her body, "It looks like you cannot decide if you want to dance or if you are scared and want to run away."

"Interesting," was all Judd said.

Alupis nodded and went back to scanning the ground for an appropriate bow shaft. 

"What are you looking for?" Judd asked.

"Something I can make into a bow," Alupis replied without looking up. 

"What are the requirements?"

"Requirements?"

"What does it need?"

"It needs to be this long, and like this," Alupis motioned with her hands to indicate it should be about her height, fairly fat around, and straight, "with no bad parts."

"Like this one?" Judd motioned to a nearby branch.

"No pine," Alupis shook her head disapprovingly, "too weak. And nothing... it needs to be dead."

The pair continued to search the ground as they began to walk forward.

"Alupis, why did you decide to join the LaurenNet earlier?" Judd asked after a few minutes.

She sighed, "I wanted you to like me so you would help me."

"What would you like my help with?"

Alupis turned to look at Judd, "I need to stay in this time and to do that I need to learn control of my power."

Judd gave the slightest of nods, "I can help."

"How do you know?" Alupis asked, "Why do you think you can teach me?"

Judd thought back to the conversation he'd had with Sascha, "Because you and I are both Telekinetics," lifting up a potential bow stick with his Tk to prove his point, he continued, "Different sub-designations, maybe, but the basics work the same. I know I can teach you because I have trained others and was trained myself."

"And what is the cost?" 

Judd thought back to the Arrow Squad training he'd received as a child. It had cost him his innocence, his freedom, and his childhood, along with the full range of human emotions to finally gain the ice-cold-precision control he now had over his Telekinesis. It had nearly cost him his sanity and his conscience as well. Yet these were prices he'd gladly go back and pay again. Without his control, the young Psy he'd accidentally killed in a childhood tantrum would not have been his only accidental casualty. True, he'd often killed as a member of the Arrow Squad, after all, they were trained assassins. But those had all been intentional deaths. Without his control, he would have followed the path of every other young Tk and either accidentally murdered the ones he loved or secluded himself away from the world until he eventually died. His life now was worth the cost. Brenna, his mate, and being part of SnowDancer were worth all of it.

"Discipline," Judd finally answered, "It will take a great deal of self-discipline and more effort than you will think yourself capable of, but you will never control your ability unless you have total control of yourself."

Alupis seemed to think about it for a minute before responding, "I see. But, what do you want for payment?"

"I do not require payment," Judd said immediately, then, remembering their earlier conversation, corrected, "I do not need any payment to do the right thing."

Alupis' eyebrows drew together, "Is this all Psy now or just some Psy?"

"Not all Psy, but many Psy do this."

"Hmm," Alupis nodded. 

"What was it like before?"

"Well, there were not as many Psy before. First, there were very few and no one understood them. So they charge for..." Alupis paused and looked off into the distance for a minute, "magic. Yes, they charge for their magic and all magic has price. With time, different magic and different prices." 

What Alupis wished she could express in this stupid language was how the Psy prices were always growing. At first, it was just money or goods that they would trade in exchange for using their abilities, but with each jump forward, Alupis had watched these demands grow from money to status to power to control. Individual Psy might offer charity, but never the Psy as a race. She almost wondered if they were incapable of it. 

"My only price is your effort," Judd clarified. 

"When do we start?" Alupis turned from her search to face him.

"How much do you already know?" Judd asked, "How much training have you received?"

"Very little," Alupis explained, "For the first long time, I met very few Psy and they were still learning themselves. Then I met a fisher named Beor. She was generous and kind and taught me... things. She taught me how to catch fish and weave nets and make mind bubbles. Most of what I know, I learned from her. She taught me how to focus and calm myself. She taught me power could... could go inside or outside. She was my only good teacher."

"What is a mind bubble?" Judd asked.

"Mind," Alupis' hands moved to form an expanding circle in front of her forehead, "bubble. It is a place for a few minds to come and talk for short times." 

"So, it is a temporary PsyNet?"

"No."

Judd tried to find a frame of reference he could use to understand what she was telling him. Back in the PsyNet, his mind was one star among many others. His mind was anchored there, but his conscious self could leave his star and travel to other parts of the Net to communicate with other roaming minds. He knew there were some sections of the Net that acted as chat-rooms for curious minds. 

"Is it like a chat-room?" Judd asked.

"What is a chat-room?"

"It is a gathering place within a Net where many minds come to talk."

"Yes, it is like this," Alupis nodded, "but not inside Net. Outside Net. Close by and not always."

"Can you show me?"

"Yes," Alupis said and started running her hands through his hair. It was weird even by Changeling standards and Judd was very uncomfortable. The tips of her fingers seemed to find what they were looking for because they stilled suddenly and she pulled his head down to touch his forehead with hers. 

"Grab the edge," Alupis instructed, "It makes easier for me."

Judd went to his outermost shield and was surprised to find a pinkish film just barely touching it. He reached out and held it in place. 

Alupis kept her eyes closed, but drew back to a more socially appropriate distance. She dropped her hands and took a few slow steps back. 

"Like this," Alupis made a motion with her head like a cat nuzzling someone's leg. 

Judd copied her motion, but nothing happened. 

"No, you must want to join. Make motion to accept. Do not just make motion."

He tried again and this time successfully entered the mind bubble. When he opened his mind's eye, he found himself in a place that was certainly different, but not entirely foreign. Like Alupis had said, it was similar to the PsyNet chat-rooms, but not. It appeared to be entirely self contained.

"How does this work?" Judd asked.

"My mind in my Net, your mind in your Net, but we come into bubble for short time to talk. We bring what we want into bubble to share and when we leave, bubble leaves and information inside bubble leaves." 

"This is incredibly useful," Judd commented, "Can anyone join any bubble?"

"If you know where it is, I think so."

"Was making mind bubbles common practice among Psy in the past?"

"It used to be," Alupis said, "And now you do not know what a mind bubble is? Even now that you are in one, you say you have not been in one before? Is this right?"

"Correct. I don't know why, but the Psy have forgotten how to do this."

Alupis made a face like she knew exactly why the Psy had forgotten how to makemind bubbles, but all she said was, "If you do not know, this is good. It should be safe to use."

"Why would it not be safe?"

Alupis made the face again and sighed loudly, "The ruling Psy decided it was too dangerous to allow free, not seen talking among their people. They say it is only for bad people and they hunt mind bubbles. But if Psy do not know this anymore" Alupis shrugged, "and in pack territory it should be safe. I think it is the easiest way for you to meet and teach me, so we use, ok?"

"Yes," Judd nodded, "now, how much control do you have over your ability?"

"It has gotten better," Alupis brightened, "I can sometimes choose what happens and when." She said this with a smile, but Judd was mildly horrified. This was a full grown Tk with the mental control of a toddler.

"Have you ever had your ability leashed?" Judd asked. This was common practice when training Psy children with particularly deadly or powerful abilities. Telepathically, he heard her wolf growl. 

"My wolf does not like being chained," Alupis understated.

"How developed are your shields? Are they capable of containing your abilities without a leash?" Judd asked, "May I see them?"

Alupis decided to allow it and brought her shielded mind inside the bubble. She was still anchored in her pack's Net, but everything except her basic tether was brought into the bubble. This Psy was dangerous in an obvious sort of way, but he was also a Lieutenant in a powerful Changeling pack. If she couldn't trust this Psy, she would never find anyone to help her.

_Oh shit,_ Judd thought to himself. Alupis' shields were all sorts of messed up. It looked like someone had ravaged her shields at some point and she had never repaired them. He almost couldn't tell where her outermost shield was supposed to be because it had been so thoroughly shattered that pieces of it were floating in orbit around her mind. The first mostly intact shield was in rough shape as well. It held deep gashes and was pitted from innumerable mental attacks. He took a moment to do a mental sweep of her shields. Not only were they incredibly primitive, they didn't even feel Psy in nature.

_How did you learn your shielding techniques?_ Judd asked, switching to telepathic communication now that they were both inside the bubble. 

_Beor tried to teach me, but it did not work for me. I never learned how to make new shields or fix shields, so I copy other's._

_So the shields around your mind are..._

_From other people, yes,_ Alupis interrupted. 

_Changeling?_ Judd finished. 

_Mostly,_ Alupis answered, _It takes time and trust to let me copy and most Psy would not let me._

Judd had intentionally not gone further into her shields while they'd talked. 

_Did you know you have a giant hole in your shields?_ He asked. 

_Yes and No. There is a hole in_ most _of my shields, but my first one has grown back._

_Can you close the hole?_

_No. I can only grow my own shield. My mind cannot heal..._ Alupis seemed to hit a snag in her language base, so instead she sent images of a knight in armor from the Middle Ages. _Armor is not part of body, so body cannot heal broken armor. This is true for me._

_May I see how far the damage goes?_

_Will you try to break into my mind?_

_No. I will not do that._

_How do I know I can trust you?_

_My mate's name is Brenna. Before I met her, she was brutalized by a sociopath who raped her mind. I held her as she healed and I have seen firsthand what kind of scars that can leave. I saw what it did to my Brenna and I would never wish that upon any other person._

_What happened to the sociopath?_

_The packs hunted him down and killed him while I kept his mind captive._

_Good. You may enter._


	16. Chapter 16

Gregori knew he had some damage control to do today. After the multiple incidents of his mate almost attacking DarkRiver's alpha pair, he had no doubt they'd soon be asked to leave. SnowDancer might be a wolf pack, but they had a blood bond with the leopards that ran so deep that an attack on one was an attack on both of them. Based on Sascha's apparent forgiveness, Gregori didn't think the SnowDancer alpha would be killing him at this meeting, but Gregori still wasn't looking forward to it. It was going to take a lot of apologizing and ass-kissing to maybe make things right between them. 

What made it even worse was that Hawke had beaten him to the punch of requesting this meeting in the first place. Gregori had been through a number of these things as a juvenile and young adult, and they always went a heck of a lot smoother when he took responsibility from the beginning and suffered the consequences like a man. Sure, he might be put on the worst shifts or have to scrub toilets for a month, but most of the time it was worth it. Besides, the maternal dominants were nothing compared to his sister, Anya. She had been a force to be reckoned with. 

Gregori smiled at the now-fond memories of them fighting and his older sister sitting on his face yelling, 'Don't make me outlive you!' A familiar twinge of pain hugged his heart at the thought of her. It had been almost nine years since he'd repeated those same words to her in a hospital room and held her as she died. She'd told him then she'd always be with him, even when she was gone. In a way, she always was. He carried her with him everywhere he went, both in his heart and in the tattoo he'd gotten in her memory. He thought again about how odd and random the things that brought her to mind were, like a disciplinary meeting with an alpha.

With that thought, he arrived outside Hawke's office and knocked politely before entering. "You wanted to see me?" he asked.

"Yes," Hawke said from behind his massive desk, "We have a bit of a situation on our hands."

"Yes, I would like to formally apologize for my actions and the actions of my mate over the last few days," Gregori interjected, "Alupis is not yet fully recovered and I rushed her into something she was not ready for. She needs time to heal and I will understand if you would prefer us to do this in our homeland. You have been very welcoming to us and I do not wish to add strain to the relationship between SnowDancer and BlackEdge."

"Actually, that's what I need to talk with you about. I've spoken with Selenka and she and I agree that it would be best if you stay for longer than anticipated. A video has surfaced that shows Alupis semi-shifting quite obviously from a Cardinal Psy into a wolf-like creature. Originally, it was posted on a website predominantly used by humans, which is the reason we hadn't heard of it until now. But apparently someone in the Consortium found it and decided to go asking questions. Now Krycheck says there's all sorts of chatter on the PsyNet about it."

Gregori sat back in open shock, "When did this video take place? How long has it been out there?"

"I can show it to you," Hawke said as he pulled it up on a comm screen, "It was taken at a small hospital in a distant suburb of Moscow." He played the clip of Alupis careening down a hallway on a gurney, then turning against three orderlies and a poorly equipped security guard. 

"This must have been right before I found her," Gregori explained. 

"Tell me what you know."

"I found her almost dead in the woods just beyond BlackEdge territory," Gregori said, "The mating bond snapped into place as soon as I saw her and I was so focused on getting her home and keeping her alive that I never thought about where she'd come from."

"Yes, well, now that the video has surfaced, there has been a lot of interest. Most people still think it's a hoax because changelings don't shift like that. However, Krycheck believes the Consortium will be watching BlackEdge, just in case, to see if they can confirm Alupis' identity."

"I see."

"Selenka called when she couldn't get ahold of you and I told her you were both recuperating from the incident earlier with Sascha," Hawke's eyes as he said this were enough to tell Gregori that the wolf alpha had not forgotten and would still probably discuss this with him later, "We've agreed that the smart play for the time being is for you and Alupis to stay in SnowDancer territory until further notice. However, if that is to happen, you will need to be extremely honest with me about Alupis."

Gregori held Hawke's icy blue gaze for as long as his dominance would allow him, "Yes."

"What is Alupis' rank?"

"She has not yet been assigned a rank in BlackEdge," Gregori said honestly, "However, when she is healed, she will likely become a soldier."

"You're not telling me everything," Hawke's natural dominance bore into Gregori.

"She used to be Alpha," Gregori said, "but before you read too much into that, you should know that Alupis is a dire wolf and can change her level of dominance when she needs to. I will not go into many details, but I will tell you she was forced into being the alpha and did not enjoy it. It did not end well for her." 

"I'm not worried about her taking SnowDancer from me," Hawke said nonchalantly, he was a very strong Alpha and he knew it, "but I have a feeling that is not all you need to tell me."

Gregori sighed, "Alupis has a bad habit of picking fights with Alphas. She tried to fight Selenka soon after joining the pack, but that was a cultural misunderstanding. Dire wolves used to change packs all the time and it was customary for dominants to fight the Alpha to determine rank. So she will probably not try to fight you, but then again, she might fight you for some other reason. If that happens, know that I will get in the way."

Hawke nodded in acceptance, "What about her psychic abilities? How much control does she have?"

Gregori took a long pause, which was enough to prompt Hawke to add, "This pack has a large territory and powerful Psy are not new to us. If she is volatile, we will find a place further from the pups, but I will not kick you out."

  
Gregori's mind wandered to where he usually felt Alupis' mind tucked up against his, but found her strangely missing, so he stroked the bond instead. "I don't know how much control she has," he said grimly, “If it’s all the same to you, I think we’d do better a small distance outside the den. Alupis would die before hurting a pup, but she does not always have control of herself.”

↞ ※ ↠

Judd's mind easily penetrated the wide hole that burrowed through Alupis' many shields. Each shield was an empty husk of what it should've been, which was yet another odd thing he didn't understand. Judd kept count as he passed through each shield. At the fifth one in, a wolf trotted up beside him. This was the first time he'd ever met one on the telepathic plane, but not the first time he'd met this wolf in particular. Two days ago wasn't so far away that he'd forgotten the giant tawny wolf Alupis had shifted into. What _was_ different was that this wolf wore a muzzle while the physical one did not. 

_Alupis?_ Judd asked gently as he extended a cautious hand towards the wolf. 

_Yes, Judd?_ Her reply did not seem to be coming from the wolf. 

_Is your wolf alright with me being in your shields?_

_For now, yes. We are both careful of you._

_How aware are you of your shields and the area immediately surrounding your mind? Most changelings can't see their natural shields and can't access their own net. Can you?_

_I can see inside my mind. The rest I do not see, but I can feel. I cannot see the hole in my shields, but I can feel it. I cannot see my packmates in my net, but I can feel where they are._

_Can you feel that your wolf is wearing a muzzle? Did you put it there?_

_I would never muzzle my wolf,_ came Alupis' indignant reply, _Can you take it off?_

Judd stepped closer to the wolf and pet it gently while examining the muzzle itself, _Yes._ Slowly, he undid the telepathic knots and chains that held the device in place. 

The wolf held still while he worked, but once it was free it backed off from Judd and tried its best to lick the sore spot the muzzle had created at the top of its neck.

Back on the physical plane, Alupis stepped forward and hugged Judd. _Thank you,_ came her mental sigh, _I have been blocking pain for so long that I didn't even realize that was still there. I thought when I shifted, it would go away._

Judd had been part of a pack for long enough to sense how much she needed to be held right now, so he didn't let go or move away. _Do you want to stop for today?_

_No,_ she said quietly and seemed more relaxed and trusting of his presence in her shields. After three more shields, the damage became less erratic and more focused on the single opening Judd knew went through each one of her external shields. At the ninth shield after that, he finally found a series of Psy shields. He could tell they all came from the same family due to the similarity of shielding techniques and unique signifiers, but like the others, these too were fragile and lifeless. 

_May I ask whose shields these were originally?_

_The ones you're at now belonged to the family I worked for when I was back in Rome. It was part of my contract with them._

_What did you do for them?_

_I was a guard dog. Rome was founded by wolf twins, so it became popular among the wealthy Psy and humans to hire wolf changelings. Most changelings did not like to live outside of pack, but it was good for me. They fed me and treated me well enough._

Judd let that sink in as he continued on through the broken shields. Two more changeling ones, one more from a Psy mind and, finally, Alupis' own natural shield. 

_Alupis, how long ago did you come to this time period?_

_Seventy-three days ago._

_Your shields are slightly red,_ Judd said, noting the distinctive pink-red color that faded to orange at the top of her shields. _Is this normal for you?_

_Right after I land, yes. Then the sun rises and it turns clear._

Judd took a moment to process this. If her mind had turned red after a large expenditure of power, then clearly she'd flamed out upon landing in this time period. It was fairly obvious, really, except for the fact that she'd been here for several months and still hadn't fully recovered. This was unheard of. The longest he'd ever heard of a Psy being unable to use their abilities was 72 hours. If she'd truly been here for that many days, he didn't need to do the math to know that 1,752 hours should've been enough time for her to recover. 

_How long does it normally take for your psychic abilities to return after a major jump?_

_That depends. Do you mean, when I can use them at all or when I can use them to jump again?_

_Both._

_Normally, I cannot use it for at least six months. Then I try to keep it in best I can. At one year, I can jump again, unless I keep myself tired. But this time is not normal. I think having Gregori and lots of food is making it go much, much faster. That is why I need you to help me so soon._

Judd braced himself for the answer as he asked, _What happens when you lose control of your abilities?_

Alupis was quiet for a bit. _Most of the time it goes to me. It makes me leave. Sometimes it makes my wolf not patient and when I get closer to jump I start half shifting more. Pups grow up a little bit faster, but not by much. About one extra week old per year. Other times I give people old hair or old face, but only to people who deserve it._

_You said this time is different. Based on your current rate of improvement, when do you think your ability will be usable again?_

_I am healing twice as fast, so maybe one more month._

_When that happens, how will you contain it?_

_I meditate and do calming exercises and remind myself that some things do not matter and are not worth getting upset about because that person will die and no one will remember them._

_That's rather morbid. Does it work?_

_Everyone dies, Judd. This is truth. And mostly, yes, thinking this does help me. Most of the time, this does keep me here. But I will not gamble with my staying with Gregori. I need a way to be sure I do not leave here._

_The only way of guaranteeing this is with a leash. I know you said your wolf does not like leashes, but I really think it is necessary in your case._

_Who will be holding the leash?_

_Ideally, I'd like to place two leashes on your ability. I'm not sure you have the Psychic abilities needed to completely leash yourself, so I'd like to be the one holding the other leash, mostly as a fail-safe in case you lose control._

_Could Gregori hold my leash?_

_No, only a Psy would be able to do that._

Alupis took a deep breath in, held it, and let out a sigh. _Ok._

_I will need you to drop your shields._

_No._

_Alupis, this is the only way I can add a leash to your telekinesis._

_No, you said you would not enter._ Alupis' wolf was right beside Judd's mind, not attacking, but definitely watchful. 

_Alupis._

_Judd. You are part of SnowDancer, not BlackEdge. I let you in, I betray my pack secrets. No. I will not do this._

_SnowDancer is on good terms with BlackEdge. I would not do what you're suggesting._

_No. We do not have... bond between packs and I do not have permission from my Alpha. I am sorry, but I cannot let you in._

_I understand. I will see if Hawke can work something out with Selenka. In the meantime, I'd like to add a warning sequence to your shield. It's a simple thing that will alert you to when power is about to go out from you. It'll also let me know when your ability has reached a functioning level. Are you alright with this?_

_Yes,_ Alupis agreed immediately.

Judd made short work of the warning device and returned to the outermost portion of Alupis' shields. 

_How do I leave this bubble?_

_Go to the edge and push through._

Alupis breathed in the calming scent of the woods and looked through the branches above her to the sky. They'd been under an 'ancient' oak this whole time. Granted, nothing was as old as she was, but this tree had clearly been here for some time. Thick knots twisted some of the lowest limbs, but up at the top was a large dead section. 

"There," Alupis pointed, "That one will make a good bow."

An hour later, Judd and the stubborn wolf who insisted on retrieving the branch herself walked out of the woods and back into the White Zone. They still had a long road ahead of them, but the first step was complete.


	17. Chapter 17

A full month had passed since they'd first come to the Sierras, and Alupis couldn't help but cling to every moment. They had been some of the happiest times of her life. She had Gregori, they were safe, and she could touch him as much as she wanted. For the first time since childhood, her skin didn't ache from lack of contact. With that thought she snuggled deeper into the warmth of Gregori's torso. Perfect.

"I like you too," Gregori mumbled in the pre-dawn light, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing.”

Too drowsy to make an issue of it, the two lay tangled in each other's arms. Gregori had almost fallen back asleep when he heard the whispered, "What's wrong is nothing is wrong."  
Gregori rolled onto his back and sucked in a deep breath to try to wake himself up. It didn't work, but caused him to yawn widely before tugging Alupis' body up so she was lying on top of him, head on his heartbeat. "No. You are wrong," another yawn, "Special flower, lots of things are wrong. We are not in Russia, you are not back to full strength yet, people who don't know you want to kill you, and you are somehow less naked than you were before."

"I was cold."

"I don't like it. My point is, there is always something bad in the world."

"But not right now, not here."

Gregori's breathing was slow and gentle, like the steady beating of his heart, "Why does that bother you?"

"Because it's going to end soon."

"Yes, probably," Gregori's hand traced lazy circles on Alupis' back, "But we have what really matters. I have you and you have me. No matter what else changes, this will never change."

Alupis tried to let those words soak into her, wash her clean of everything her mind told her was about to happen, "Mors tua mors mea."

"I don't like s'mores," he mumbled, "too sweet."

"Your death, my death."

"Oh. That's true too," Gregori pulled the blanket higher and tucked it over her shoulders, "Do you feel better now?"

"Yes," she whispered into his chest, taking simple pleasure in the strength of his relaxed muscles. Thinking back to her mental training, she practiced the trick of focusing her mind. Slowly, all the world faded away until the only thing that existed was the only heartbeat that mattered more than her own. That beat was her lifeline, but how soon would it become her noose? She could never leave Gregori, not even if she wanted to. Yet, how much longer would she have? What if Judd couldn't train her fast enough? What if she accidentally teleported to a time without her mate?

Her mind tugged again on the leash Judd had helped her put there a week ago, testing its strength and reminding herself of its presence. As always, she tugged it just a little bit tighter before leaving it alone. Her ability would not cost her even a minute's worth of time with Gregori. Not. Even. One.

For the next hour, Alupis practiced every mental exercise Judd had taught her so far: she practiced her memorized lists, images and maneuvers, focused on items around the room until she could feel every individual molecule of its construction, and added another layer of coating onto her shields. Finally content in her efforts, she dozed in Gregori’s arms until daybreak.

  
                                                                                                                                      ↞ ※ ↠

  
The dew still clung to the grass as Alupis left the cabin they’d been moved to for the remainder of their stay. Alupis liked it better this way; closer to the wild, further from the people. Soaking in a deep breath, she gloried in the cold mountain air that only smelled this exact way in the early morning. Stretching out, she left the small porch and began a light jog. She might not be as fast as she once was, but she’d gotten used to her new gait and her foot had healed enough to not hurt anymore.  
As always, she let her wolf come to the front of her mind while she ran. It appreciated these things more than the Psy half did. Plus, it was far better at scenting danger and anticipating attacks. “I’m safe,” she reminded herself. Her wolf agreed, but didn’t halt its vigilance. Some habits weren’t worth breaking.

Alupis was halfway to her destination when she scented a predator running slightly ahead of her on a parallel course. Hawke, she recognized, was offering to run with her. Grinning, her wolf took up the challenge and sped up to intercept his path. Though they both ran in human form, Hawke wouldn’t let her off easy. Instead, he pushed her to keep up with him and led her into rougher terrain than she was used to. Good heavens, she’d needed this. It had been ages since she’d run with an alpha; hadn’t even realized how much her wolf’s soul needed this to feel settled. When they finally stopped at the clearing where Alupis always met Judd for training, she was the only one out of breath.

“Don’t think that just because you’re outside of the den, that you’re outside of my care,” Hawke stood in front of her, having not even broken a sweat, “If you need something, ask for it.”

Alupis kept panting, but nodded.

“Good,” Hawke said and turned to leave.

“Hawke?”

“Yes?” He paused.

“Can I have a hug?”

With a smile, he pulled her into a tight hug. Inside, her wolf relaxed, knowing that it was more than just tolerated in this territory. It was welcome and loved.

“Thank you,” Alupis said as she loosened her grip.

Hawke kissed her forehead and ran off saying, “I’ll see you for another run tomorrow!”

After catching her breath, Alupis looked up at the sun. She was definitely early. Although her muscles were still protesting from the run, Alupis willed her body to move through the calming exercise routine a friend had taught her so long ago. Feet planted and strong like the earth. Her limbs flowed through the positions like water, every transition taking the path of least resistance.

“Keep going,” Judd said when she saw him and would’ve stopped. Alupis finished the sequence and turned to bow respectfully towards her teacher.

“I’ve never seen that sequence before. Where did you learn it?”

“Zhongguo.”

“Is that a person or a place?”

“Place. Far over… there,” Alupis pointed over a ridge.

Judd tossed her the child’s toy he’d brought with him today. It was a ball. “I thought we’d start with your telekinesis today. I want you to bounce it without using your hands.”

Alupis stared at it. “How?”

“Start with what you already know. Focus your mind on the physical structure of the ball and the area directly surrounding it, then exert pressure to make it move.”

Alupis breathed and tried to do what Judd said. She could feel the ball in her mind, the slightly tacky rubber feel of the outside, the way it changed textures on the inside and the air pressure both within and around the ball. She reached for the psychic power that kept growing every day she healed. Down. Nothing happened. Refocusing on air at the top of the ball, she tried again. DOWN. This time the ball slammed to the ground, but Alupis didn’t release it soon enough. Before she could stop it, the ball flattened and popped under the pressure. “Oops.”

“It’s alright. That’s what usually happens the first time. I brought a second one as well,” Judd took a rubber bouncy ball from his back pocket, “The smaller surface area and denser construction will make this one harder to destroy.”

It took some time, but eventually Alupis was able to telekinetically “catch” the ball and drop it gently to make it bounce. The trick, she discovered, was doing the same thing physically that her mind was trying to do telekinetically.

“Good,” Judd nodded after Alupis was able to bounce the ball three times in a row. “But don’t become too dependent on your body. Your mind can do things your body cannot. Take a seat.” While Alupis did so, Judd flicked his pocket knife over his palm. He held out his hand so she could see the shallow cut he’d made. “The mind is part of the body, but for the Psy, it is more than that.” As he spoke, Alupis watched the cut on his hand seemed to knit itself together. “Just like your eyes can do things that your hands cannot, your mind can do things that the rest of your body is not capable of. Alupis, if you chain your psychic abilities to your physical movements, you will never reach your full potential.” Judd wiped the blood from his hand to reveal a pink scar that quickly disappeared. “Do you understand?”

“Yes, how did you do that?”

“My sub-designation is Tk-Cell. It means I can move individual cells in the body. I believe your sub-designation is closely related to my own. If I’m right, then I should be able to teach you how to do this as well. Are you willing to try?”

“Yes.”

“Pick a scar.”

Alupis thought for a moment before pointing to a small scar on her left forearm.

“Focus on it like we’ve been practicing. Look for the difference in structures between scar tissue and the other surrounding tissue. Once you find it, go down to the smallest unit you can.”

Alupis focused on doing that as Judd explained the biological differences between scar tissue and other tissues and the body’s physiological response to damage and how it was possible to manipulate the body’s natural reactions to produce the desired results. Most of this was outside even Gregori’s English vocabulary, so she just waited until Judd started using simpler commands and followed his directions.

Closing her eyes, she did her best to do as Judd directed. She reached out for the individual cells in the scar and willed them to change.

“Alupis, what are you doing?”

“What you told me to do,” Alupis frowned and opened her eyes, “Is it not working?” She looked at her arm and there was no longer a scar. In its place was a line of long tawny hairs mixed with short fluffier ones. Alupis stared. It took a moment before her brain made the connection. She’d changed her cells. She. A Psy but also a Changeling. Had. Just. Changed. Her. Cells.  
Judd watched as realization dawned on her face. She looked at him, eyes and mouth wide in excitement before shifting the rest of her cells into their wolf form. In the next instant, a giant dire wolf stood in front of him, oddly still and unsure of itself. The shift was a bit slower and didn’t sparkle like the other ones he’d seen, but when she did it again her human form was standing in front of him.

“It didn’t hurt,” she said quietly, her body tense in suspended belief, “I… it didn’t hurt. Did I just shift??? Judd! Did I just shift!!??”

“Yes!”

“Oooowoooop!” Alupis yelled, “Oh, wait. I don’t have to do that anymore.” Alupis grinned with a century’s worth of excitement and shifted smoothly into her wolf form. Her head tilted back as her lungs sang out the loudest howl Judd had ever heard.  
It didn’t hurt. It didn’t hurt. It didn’t hurt. She bounced in circles around Judd before coming to an abrupt stop. I have to go show Gregori.

Alupis raced off without another word. Every step felt right. Oh, how she’d missed running in her wolf form. Alupis’ mind sank into her wolf as it leapt over fallen branches and navigated the rocky terrain between the clearing and the cabin. She’d just reached the wide meadow that was the halfway point when she saw Gregori was already barreling through the tall grasses in his wolf form. The two were each running so fast that they almost collided when they met.

Meeting was like two best friends who hadn’t seen each other in ages. Gregori’s wolf was all over Alupis, sniffing her fur and wagging his tail like a pup. She was the same way with him, only with more jumping, vocalizing, and licking. Playful in her newfound freedom, Alupis went down on her front paws and with her hind-parts in the air started to growl. Gregori playfully lunged at her and grabbed a chunk of her fur in his mouth, she reached up and bit part of his shoulder hard enough to hurt but not break the skin. Spinning out of the hold, Gregori nipped her ear as payback. Alupis jumped back, then balanced on her one back leg to stand and pounce on Gregori from above. The pair tumbled to the ground where Gregori used the momentum from her attack to roll her onto her back and clamp his jaws lightly over the base of her throat, letting her know he’d won. What he hadn’t taken into consideration, however, was that her dire wolf neck was just barely long enough reach around and bite his skull in return. They both let go and Alupis took off running with a ‘come chase me’ sort of look. Their wolves took turns chasing each other all over the meadow, cutting a hundred new paths through the tall grass before Hawke jogged up to greet them.

“Well look at you!” Hawke exclaimed proudly as he ruffled the fur between Alupis’ ears.

Alupis held her head up high and trotted back and forth a couple times before shifting back into a human. “Look what I can do! Watch!”

That’s exactly what he did as Alupis slowly transformed back into a giant tawny wolf whose tail never stopped wagging. Leaning back, Hawke let out a howl from his own wolf, celebrating his guest’s achievement. Alupis and Gregori joined in the song, harmonizing as they honored this moment. Soon enough, dozens of SnowDancers started showing up as Hawke guided them all towards the white zone where the pups were surely waiting to join in on the fun.

  
                                                                                                                                      ↞ ※ ↠  
  
Deep within DarkRiver’s territory, Ashaya Aleine's striking grey-blue eyes stared at the data streaming through her comm screen. Seeing beyond what anyone other than her remarkable twin sister could see, she looked into the DNA itself. Though her breathing barely changed, the hint of a sigh that escaped was enough for Dorian to wrap himself around her.

"What's the matter, Shaya?" He spoke into her electric curls, breathing in the sweet scent of her.

"Bo just sent me a copy of his most recent scans," she didn't look up as she continued, "The neural chip that protects him from psychic intrusion is showing signs of further decay. The good news is that it seems to be slowing down, but unless we find a solution, the chances of him surviving are near zero.” Ashaya closed her eyes, “He has about nine months to a year left if the chip continues at its current rate.”

Dorian's muscles stiffened on their own. The Human Alliance was an important part of Trinity, but it was really their security chief, Bowen Knight, who held them all together. Without Bo, there was a good chance that the Human Alliance would fall apart.

“If anyone can figure this out, it’s you,” Dorian comforted.

“I just hope I can do it in time.”

 


	18. Chapter 18

Later that evening, Gregori held his mate close as he put in Selenka’s code on the comm screen in their cabin. It had taken several hours for all the excitement and playing to calm down, but afterwards some of the maternal dominants had brought out a huge spread of food for everyone. After all, shifting burns a lot of calories and no celebration is complete without food.  
Once everyone had eaten and shared their congratulations, Gregori had carried his tired mate back to their cabin for a nap, more food, and a more intimate celebration of their own. Damn, but he was so proud of her. Leave it to Alupis to figure it out in her own way. Slowly but surely, it seemed like she was finally getting to be the fullest version of herself and Gregori just fell further and further in love with her.

“You’re amazing,” Gregori mumbled into her neck between kisses.

“If you want some alone time, call me back at a more reasonable hour,” Selenka grumbled as she drank from the mug a packmate had made for her. It was a beautiful, hand-sculpted thing. Black as charcoal, but with bursts of rich blues and purples pouring down from the rim. It was so majestically large that Selenka used both hands when holding it. “What are you calling me about so early?”

“We have big news.” Gregori squeezed Alupis tightly, “you want to tell her or should I?”

Alupis sat up a little straighter and looked Selenka in the eye, “Alpha, I can shift.”

“Well, damn! That IS worth a comm call!” She laughed into her coffee, “How long? How’d you do it?”

“She figured it out this morning, well, morning for us, and it was during her training session with Hawke’s Psy lieutenant and something about her Psy half but… Alupis? You want to try to explain it?”

“My Psy ability lets me control what Judd calls my ‘cells’ and that is how I can change my human cells into my wolf cells.”

Selenka whistled a note that went from high to low, “Good work, Alupis. I’m proud of you.”

The already broad smile on Alupis’ face grew, “Thank you, Alpha.”

“Selenka. You’re my pack, Alupis. You can call me Selenka. And speaking of the pack, we miss you here. Gregori, when are you and her coming home?”

Gregori rested his chin on Alupis’ head as he thought, “Well, we’ve been staying here because of that video and so Alupis could train more with Judd. Alupis wants to continue training with Judd, and I agree with her. I don’t think we should come home until Alupis is comfortable controlling her abilities. After she reaches that point, it will only be the backlash from the video keeping us away. What can you tell us about that from your end? Has interest died down?”

“Unfortunately, no. We were able to delete and replace the original security footage at the hospital, so no one can prove anything should they go looking. But stills from the video are in too many places for our techs to get rid of them all.” Selenka uploaded a few of the most popular images on the screen so Gregori could see what they were dealing with. “There’s been a mixed response. Most people seem to think it’s an ill-timed racist hoax, since she kinda looks like one of those old ‘werewolf’ propaganda posters. People who don’t know better are blaming the consortium for creating it in order to sow discord between the three races. We’ve actually had a lot of positive support come out of this, surprisingly.” Selenka took another large sip of her coffee.

“In what way?”

“Things like people commenting on the video and stills, our business partners mentioning it after a few meetings, oh, and actually, let me pull it up to show you…” Selenka’s eyes roved across the screen before apparently finding it, “you’re going to find this one funny.” On the screen appeared a close up to Alupis’ semi-shifted angry face with the words ‘Me before I’ve had coffee’ in bold above it. “Ilya wants to put this on a t-shirt.”

“Hmm, I wonder who the first one will go to,” Gregori said with a look.

“I am very happy with my life choices, thank you very much.” Shifting her giant mug to one hand, she punctuated her comments by taking three long sips while making a rude gesture. “Unfortunately, I don’t think the consortium is buying this as a hoax. Back when it first surfaced, we had to chase off some ‘campers’ who were a little too close to our border. I’ve quietly updated some of our security measures, but I have a hunch that our public appearances are being tracked. If I were the consortium, I’d be watching the closest wolf pack to that hospital. If I couldn’t find any specifically new people, then I'd switch to looking for anyone who’s missing.”

Gregori nodded slowly, “That’d be me.”

“We’ve done a good job of hiding it, but eventually someone will notice. It doesn’t have to be tomorrow, but I think an afternoon in Moscow will ultimately keep Alupis safer.”

“I don’t like the idea of being gone for so long. Plus, having me fly in makes it obvious that I’ve been gone.”

“I’ve thought about that. Would you feel comfortable asking Judd to teleport you to Moscow and back?”

“Yes. Even if he can’t do it himself, he could arrange it.”

“Alright, then. It's settled,” Selenka said into her emptying coffee cup.

                                                                                                                                         ↞ ※ ↠

A few days later, Gregori ran his fingers through Alupis’ hair one more time before dragging himself out of bed. He’d been successfully running BlackEdge’s automotive businesses from the cabin’s communication panel for the past month. However, it wouldn’t hurt to use his public “afternoon in Moscow” to meet with and possibly acquire a company he’d been interested in for a while. It was a small human engineering outfit, but they were doing wonders with a new prototype radiator that simultaneously cooled the engine while converting the excess heat energy into a form that could recharge the vehicle’s power cells.

With the time difference between California and Moscow, he’d been able to arrange it so he would be gone while Alupis was asleep and back before she woke up. Gregori stroked his mate once more through the bond, making sure she slept soundly and comfortably before he quietly closed the door behind him. He tied the red scarf that was to be the image lock for his teleporter to a tree and sent the picture of it to Vasic. A minute later, he found himself in an alley about two blocks from his meeting.

                                                                                                                                        ↞ ※ ↠

  
Alupis awoke in the embrace of a nightmare, surrounded by tangled sheets. Her mind was still filled with images of her pack’s sacred den being ransacked as her lieutenants fought desperately to defend their home. Biting back the edge of memory, she flailed her way out of bed and to the floor. THE PUPS! What had happened to the pups?! She had to make sure they were okay. If those bastards had hurt them… no. She couldn’t think like that. Instead, she grabbed her boots and ran pell-mell out the door and through the forest. Out of breath but running on an adrenaline kick born of fierce protective instincts, she was determined to not stop until she found her most precious pack-mates. She’d made it to the area where SnowDancer had recently replanted hundreds of baby trees before the warning signal went off in her head.

SHIT.

Of course her abilities would choose NOW of all times to fuck shit up for her. She was in no mood to “calm down” and keep her power contained, not when she needed all these emotions to find and protect those who were hers. Not willing to jump even a second into the future, Alupis directed the surge of power the warning had indicated to the area outside of her. Flowers bloomed and fell in a cascade of petals that were quickly joined by the colorful fall of autumn leaves as the trees hurtled through years worth of seasons back to back, the debris wilting and returning to the earth in a fraction of the time it normally took. Thirty feet away, she heard a soft thump as an unlucky squirrel fell dead to the earth.  
Damn. She hadn’t realized how much had built up or how far her blast would reach. Through gritted teeth, she used her training to pull her power back in until it was only pouring into the tree she’d dug her claws into.

Hawke’s wolf caught the scent of decaying leaves as he ran alongside his mate, Sienna, in the moonlight. While this is a very normal scent in the woods, the sheer intensity of it was unusual, especially since they were nearing the old battlefield. They’d finished replanting only a year ago, so there hadn’t been enough time for it to develop the thick layer of squishy leaves he was smelling. He motioned for Sienna to slow down as he went ahead. That’s when he saw Alupis by the tree and realized what was going on.

The sleek white of his pelt was hard to hide this late into spring and Hawke made no effort at subtlety as he made his slow but steady approach. Based on what he’d been told of her background, he knew she’d be unpredictable in this mood even without his startling her.

Alupis’ body heaved from exertion, but the trees surrounding her seemed to be staying in the correct season. She turned her head at Hawke’s approach and froze, her expression a mix of relief, despair, and a tragic sort of hope.

“Kleinarsch!” It came out a broken sob as she ran to him and threw her arms around his wolf’s neck. “Kleinarsch! Welpen. Wo sind die welpen?” A shadow washed over her expression as she seemed to remember something. “Kleina…”, she began but couldn’t continue. Instead, she sank back into his neck and cried tears that spoke of deep relief rather than sadness. Composing herself, Alupis sat back on her knees and wiped her face. “You are not Kleinarsch,” she said with a post-cry snuffle, “You look so much like him, but you do not smell like him.”  
Hawke licked her face and she laughed, “I am better now. I remember when I am. But… can I see the pups? I… I know they are not my pups, but I need to see that they are alright.”  
He nodded, and as they both began to move, Sienna came over to meet them. Alupis bristled slightly at the sight of yet another Cardinal Psy, but didn’t make any aggressive moves.

“I didn’t want to interrupt earlier,” Sienna began, “but if you ever want my help with your training, Alupis, it’s yours. I know what it’s like to feel overwhelmed by an ability no one really understands.”

“That is not what I was crying about,” Alupis said a little too coldly before shifting into her wolf form.

 _You wanna talk about that?_ Hawke said, wolf to wolf.

Alupis sped up a bit to walk ahead of him.

 _We both know I’m faster than you_ , Hawke maneuvered easily beside her, _and you can’t shut me out by shifting._

Alupis slowed down to a walk, but didn’t say anything for a long while. _I used to be an Alpha, Alupis began, her voice soft and brittle sounding. Hawke didn’t interrupt. I had a pack that lived near the border of France and the Holy Roman Empire. We were strong enough to hold our territory, but we always kept our den a secret. We even had more than one den so we could confuse any enemies. We were not perfect, but we trusted each other._

Alupis was quiet for several more minutes before continuing, _My den was betrayed by someone who should have known better. He slaughtered his own people out of spite and revenge. He sold us to the Psy._ Alupis shook her head no, _He sold me. He hated me. I was the reason my pack became a target, but he was the one who killed us. He told them too much when he told them how to catch me, then they came and attacked us all. My friend, the one I thought was you, he was the Alpha of a neighboring pack. Of course we had some tension over our borders, but we also had an agreement that if anything ever happened to either of our packs, we could send our pups and know they’d be protected. I sent them to him that awful night and have always hoped that some of my pack made it safely. That he protected them as I could not._

The tear in her heart was a huge and gaping thing, so much that Hawke felt it tearing into his own. Pack was life and pups were at the heart of it. NO ONE fucked with the pups. Hawke moved so his body brushed up against hers, comforting her. _It wasn’t your fault._

_No, it wasn’t. But as Alpha, they were my responsibility._

_You know who else had responsibility for those pups?_ Hawke growled, _The fucker shit-wolf who betrayed you. That’s on HIM, not you._ Hawke spun until he and Alupis were nose to nose. Throwing his considerable dominance into his voice, he stared her down and told her about the SnowDancer who had betrayed his pack by selling drugs, murdering a packmate, and helping a sociopath kidnap another packmate. _Traitors get punished. Harshly. With death. But that doesn’t stop all traitors. Know what else won’t stop betrayal? A paranoid alpha who sees traitors who don’t exist. You did not know he would betray the den. You could not stop it from happening. As one alpha to a... a previous alpha, you need to accept that._

 _Ok,_ Alupis said a bit timidly. She may have once been an Alpha, but she’d been forced to grow into that dominance and had lost much of it when she’d been broken.  
They walked the rest of the way in comfortable silence. The den’s nursery was emptiest at night, but usually there were a few children whose parents were away for the night who stayed there. Tonight, there were five little ones all snuggled in a pile on the padded nap time mats. Alupis carefully sniffed each of them to make sure they were alright and sound asleep before she took up a secondary guard post at the door. She would keep them safe. No matter what else might happen, she would never again let another one of her pups get hurt.


End file.
